Tom Horne's Cocktail Party at University Club Crashed by Yours Truly

I told Kobach the nickname was because I'm always giving Arpaio the bird in print. Arpaio shook his finger at me. Kobach laughed, then I asked him if he supported Tom Horne.

He said yes, of course, and I asked why. He told me it's because they were working together on suing the federal government regarding their respective states' voter ID (read "voter suppression") measures.

I asked him if it would matter to him if Horne was personally corrupt.

"Personally corrupt?" asked Kobach.

"You know, say, if he hired his mistress to a state job that paid $108K per year," I told him.

"Well, I'd need to know more," he replied.

"I can send you some links," I told him.

"I'm sure you can," he laughed.

I wondered, since he's considered the "dark lord of the anti-immigration movement," in the words of Democratic Illinois Congressman Luis Gutierrez, if there was anyone on the other side of the immigration issue with whom he could have a civil discussion.

"Oh, yeah, I have civil discussions with people all the time on the subject of immigration," he assured me. He was vague on specifics.

I asked him what he thought of former Florida Governor Jeb Bush's comment, calling illegal immigration to the United States an "act of love."

He said he wasn't sure if it was a well-planned comment or an ill-advised comment.

"By that logic, if you're selling drugs to provide for your kids, that's an act of love," he said.

Er, not really. Though it may depend on the drug. There's a whole industry in Colorado that would take offense at Kobach's statement.

I asked him who he liked in the Republican field for president in 2016. He said he didn't know whom he was going to endorse or support, but he mentioned U.S. Senator from Texas Ted Cruz as someone whose positions he kinda liked.

By this point, Horne had exited stage right. I did run into him earlier as he was eating something, with some white foodstuff smeared all over his mouth. He was jittery, and dived into what little crowd there was. I figured I could catch him as the crowd wound down.

Eh, it's not like I won't have more opportunities in the near future to grill him as I previously have.

Much of the rest of the evening was left chatting with Teresa Ottensen Binder, a Pinal County Horne-supporter, and with several ladies from the Horne camp, who hung out.

Gossip, mostly. Suffice it to say that they are not big fans of Sarah Beattie, and have any number of conspiracy theories that involve her being a plant for either Horne's GOP primary opponent Mark Brnovich or the Arizona Public Integrity Alliance, a Republican group which opposes Horne's corruption.

Naturally, they have no evidence to back up their theories, and I'm all about the evidence.

Which Beattie, say what her critics may, has in plentiful supply.

Got a tip for The Bastard? Send it to: Stephen Lemons.

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49 comments
MaskedMagician1967
MaskedMagician1967 topcommenter

I hope you had some alcohol at your home mr lemons. Having to deal with corrupt assholes like HorniBoi, Arpaio, and Kobach...

I would pay good money to see HorniBoi get arrested for corruption. I've got my favorite perp-walk music ready.

VOTE FOR ROTELLINI COME NOVEMBER.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

quick question for you Stephen........................did Horne hit on you? I have seen pictures of Carmen Chenal................so i was just wondering where Tom would draw the line? if he didnt hit on you, its probably because you left before he could work his way over to drop the old patent "Big Horne" pick up line on you........(it works, just ask Carmen)

DNichols
DNichols

Cute picture of the little gay couple wearing dark suits,  is that a photo of K.K.K. crosses behind them on the wall?

Did the $100.00 fee to get in cover the choice of  either a white sheet hood, or a Nazi arm band?

What a Hate Group Party.

I hope Horne didn't "hit, and run" any cars after the party.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

cost to get in the door, $100...............cost of being there, your dignity..........value of Lemons write up on the event, priceless

JoeArpaioFan
JoeArpaioFan

Make no mistake about it, get prepared for SB1070 version 2.0 that will be coming soon -- nationwide! The American people have had enough.

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

No one should have to endure that scene for the sake of a story. But then no one should have to work for Horne for sake of a paycheck. It's all relative.


I enjoyed the story. Glad I didn't have to be there. I would have been, but the toilet seemed more important. And productive.

Flyer9753
Flyer9753 topcommenter

You ask where Perez and the lefties were???


Per your own story it was a non-event, more a party of his staff... i.e. people who were paid to be there one way or another


Why waste energy and resources on a non-event???


And the fact it was such a non-event speaks volumes

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

as entertaining as your story was Stephen, you missed the best questions you could have asked that would have made this the greatest story ever................you should have asked Seagal if he signed the MCSO corrective missive............and if he said yes..............you should have just simply said........."can you explain it to me Steve?" if you would have done that, you would either be the greatest journalist or the greatest comedian (it would all depend on if you could keep from laughing long enough to type Steve's answer or not)

ConcernedCitizenAZ
ConcernedCitizenAZ topcommenter

Kansas Secretary of State carpet-bagging in Arizona? On Kansas taxpayers' dime?

jurywork
jurywork

Segal: "We don't belong in Ukraine."  Sounds like a GEICO commercial.  Everyone knows that!  Did you know rock beats scissors?  Uh-oh!

Jukes
Jukes

Thanks for taking a bullet for us, Stephen.  I would say I hoped you got some free food and drinks out of the experience, but I doubt a sane person's stomach could process anything in that company. 

eric.nelson745
eric.nelson745 topcommenter

Really, everyone should start an office pool. Whoever wins the big prize must accurately predict the date when Horneboi is indicted on federal charges of racketeering and corruption.

wtf...
wtf...

Good stuff Lemons!... I bet they burned a cross at the end.

bobunf
bobunf

Great story.  It would be really funny, except that Horne and Arpaio are the top law enforcement guys in Arizona and Maricopa respectively.  With that I really need to know, where's the Federal Marshall?

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

good story stephen, had some pretty good laughs in it. (sorry you had to meet Seagal though...........no one should have to suffer that)

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@MaskedMagician1967  hearing Lemons tale is kind of like hearing the tales of Henry Hill.............Lemons was immersed in the seedy underbelly of crime and made it out to tell us all about it...................only Lemons didnt have to rat to get off a coke charge to tell us his tale..............he did it for entertainments  sake (and i thank him for that sacrifice)

MaskedMagician1967
MaskedMagician1967 topcommenter

Be quiet Robert. The U.S. Supreme Court will void BS1070.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@arizonanewtimes.com  unfortunately they havent had enough, if they had, they wouldnt keep re-electing these crooks. the only difference between Stephen Lemons spending the night with these people or spending the night in a holding cell is that everyone was wearing a tie where Lemons spent his night 

WhoKnows
WhoKnows topcommenter

@arizonanewtimes.com  It will be called "immigration reform" and make clowns like Kobach look even more like bigoted idiots...

Flyer9753
Flyer9753 topcommenter

@TommyCollins  100% agree


To Mr. Lemons - please do not take my comment to mean I thought you should not have covered it or anything like that. My comment was entirely meant as a dig at Horne and company.


I am glad you did and wrote your as usual, great story about it :)

66rock
66rock topcommenter

@Flyer9753  Do you know who Ken from Kansas is? His history and background?  Who supported him to write those laws?  This was not just a "staff meeting", I assure you.  try google 

stephen.lemons
stephen.lemons moderator writer

@danzigsdaddy  I didn't get a chance, sadly. But that's a great question, and next time I get the chance, I will ask. He'll be around till the old man chokes on a chicken bone or strokes out. Assuming Seagal doesn't do so first. So I think that chance will come.

66rock
66rock topcommenter

@ConcernedCitizenAZ  Or Kochs?  His buddy Cathy Horrid wasn't there? Oh never mind, they proberly had already met up somewhere else.

66rock
66rock topcommenter

@eric.nelson745    Day after primary in August? If he loses that is.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@eric.nelson745  seeing how justice works these days............can i say never? crooks look out for crooks

66rock
66rock topcommenter

@wtf...    No, Rusty had the matches and he didn't show up! 

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@wtf...  or evidence...........that seems more likely with the crowd that was in attendance

MaskedMagician1967
MaskedMagician1967 topcommenter

Zigs, I found something interesting.

Sheila Polk reinstated the campaign finance allegations against HorniBoi.

Even MontyPug is telling HorniBoi not to seek re-election this year. MontyPug is saying it's "for the betterment of Arizona" that HorniBoi not seek re-election.

I'll see ifI can link the page over.

fishingblues
fishingblues topcommenter

@NarcissistPolice


d-nick is a self righteous bigoted ass, although he sees himself as wonderful.


I believe "narcissist" fits quite nicely.  

DNichols
DNichols

@dipshit

I just said they were a cute couple?!

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@WhoKnows Sal Russo, co-founder of the "Tea Party Express" is calling for them to embrace immigration reform.................seems he just figured out REFORM does not mean blanket amnesty. took long enough for him to look up the word reform...........right?

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@stephen.lemons if you do ask him if he signed it, you have to follow up with whether or not he comprehends it......................$50 says he just pencil whipped his name if he did sign it and never read or understood it (with all the time he claims he spent on the range honing his skills..........he couldnt have possibly had time)

ConcernedCitizenAZ
ConcernedCitizenAZ topcommenter

@66rock  You mean Cathi Herrod, and her husband, Judge Herrod, and Len Munsil, the founder of Center for Arizona Policy?

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@WhoKnows why? is Carmen no longer with Tommy-boy anymore? Seagal had to sell his Cali home so i dont think he can pay her as much as Tommy-boy did (on our dime)

ConcernedCitizenAZ
ConcernedCitizenAZ topcommenter

Maricopa County Bill Montgomery stated that AG Tom Horne was not fit for office. Why didn't he handle it correctly the first time around? Now that others have stepped forward, he comes belatedly to the podium.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@MaskedMagician1967  i have a sick mother that i am taking care of. she stays at my house, but when i got home today, she had saved me the article about that from the Az Rep. she had that and a a ice cold IPA for me when i walked in the door......................yes siree Bob......life is good (dont know what was better.......the ice cold IPA or the Polk news??? they were both tremendously enjoyable)

fishingblues
fishingblues topcommenter

@DNichols  Been to hell, have you?


... and still trying to give advice ...



DNichols
DNichols

@fishingblues

Take a deep breath?

Wow.

Hell haveth no fury like yours.

fishingblues
fishingblues topcommenter

@DNichols


Aren't you the smug, judgmental little shit-stain.


You get your ass kicked so you:


**  Attack a person's mother

**  See child porn in innocent pictures

**  Attempt to give medical advise (I have about one drink a week and don't do drugs of any kind).


You are one of the most bigoted POS on this board and yet have the nerve to point your stinky little finger at others and pretend you are pure.  You self-righteous, pretentious prick.  


How's that fuck-stick?  I cleaned it up just for you.  I certainly wouldn't want to offend your delicate sensibilities.  





DNichols
DNichols

@fishingblues

Sorry about your Mother.

You should consider lowering your meds, and alcohol?

Then work on your filthy mouth or mind/key pad?!.

fishingblues
fishingblues topcommenter

@DNichols  


My mother is dead, so no.  Is "ass" too "filthy" for you or was it narcissist? 


If you are getting child porn out of that avatar, you are one sick son of a bitch and deserve to have your nut sack cut.    

DNichols
DNichols

@fishingblues

Do you kiss your Mother with that filthy mouth?

Thanx again for the child porn.

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