Top 10 Lines to Use at the "Celebrity Roast" of Joe Arpaio

Categories: List This
arpaio-photo2.jpg
Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his man-boob.


This weekend, a charity is hosting a "celebrity roast" of Sheriff Joe Arpaio.

Chris Kattan from Saturday Night Live and comedian Joey Medina are supposed to be a couple of the roasters. In case they have trouble coming up with material, we've made a list of the top-10 lines to roast Arpaio:

10.) Joe Arpaio's so bad at fighting crime, he issues press releases when janitors are arrested.

arpaio-photo10.jpg

Boom. Roasted.
My Voice Nation Help
79 comments
Carole Magary
Carole Magary

Camille I am Caucasian and when pulled over in Fla I showed id and whomever was in the car. Same in N.Y.C.

Camille Stodgell
Camille Stodgell

Yes, He is doing his job...Quite well. That is why there are a lot of people who hate Sheriff Joe out there...Any one who is pulled over by law enforcement In AZ & elsewhere is asked to show ID. That can & often does include everyone in the car.. Does not matter what race, color or creed you are...Illegal or not..We were Born In The U.S.A. & All of us were asked for our ID. That is not profiling or violating our right's. That is an officer doing his job......

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

Its not the race that I am against. Its the illegal immigrants as a whole...so dig the sand out of your vagina and relax..not once did I mention race you retard.

Debra Baum
Debra Baum

Aw, no sweetheart, not the only one. But I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt that you were an ignorant moron who didn't read, over the idea that you were just a horrible person. I guess that hope is lost. :)

Debra Baum
Debra Baum

How shocking that Chuck likes oppression. Racists are the lowest form of life and I could smell this one a mile away. I mean, only the dumbest people on the planet are racist... what a ridiculous thing to be. "I shot out of a white woman's vagina by complete random chance!" Congratulations! What an amazing effort you made to be the skin color you are! Of course you want to hold back all those other people who are a different color than you, they weren't AWESOME enough to be born to your incredible white parents. You should probably start a hate group against people who are shorter or taller than you, too. Fucking people... how DARE they not be the same height as you! Racists may have "won" the race lottery, but really they should be pitied being that they lost the brain lottery.

Adam Piontkowski
Adam Piontkowski

He very rarely smiles, and when he does it is usually after a very evil sounding remark.

Carole Magary
Carole Magary

Debra Baum...of course you are the only one who reads.

Laird Creevy
Laird Creevy

How can he keep up with all that high-tech gadgetry in the background?!

Lauri Owen
Lauri Owen

We want heroes in law enforcement, not bigots.

Joe Kennedy
Joe Kennedy

Yep and wastes tax payers dollars in the process. Now as far as eating my dick... would that be just the head half of it or all of it? Also should I saute it, broil it, fry it or possibly grill it? I mean you should know how one eats their own dick since you brought it up.

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

Yep. Got a new 12 Gage. Good Sunday.

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

But he oppresses them and makes a point to fuck with them....that I enjoy....so eat your dick you fucktard.

Joe Kennedy
Joe Kennedy

Hey genius did you know he hasn't deported a single illegal immigrant? No you probably don't.

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

Go Joe!!! Keep up the good work! Millions of natural born American citizens support your work and share your sentiments. Keep immigration legal and keep illegals OUT!!!

Debra Baum
Debra Baum

Did you read the article? Have you done one ounce of investigation into publicly available information about him and the way he violates the law and human rights constantly? Is that "his job"? I don't remember that being in the job description of any branch of law enforcement. But what do I know, I'm only someone who actually reads and learns before making half-witted statements on the internet.

Debra Baum
Debra Baum

Hurry along to your white supremacy meeting

Justin Heer
Justin Heer

Hey joe I hope you get shot in the dick by a j walking illegal immigrant .. What goes around comes around...there's such a thing in this world called hunger , and if you were born In another country , you would want the same for your self and fam ... Your a down presser and a douche ... Your a bad representative of Arizona... Work on yourself instead of fuckin with people that just want to feed there families...

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

I support Joe. Those who hate him support illegals...fuck them all.

Rick Larsen
Rick Larsen

I feel a hashtag coming on: #roastjoe

DNichols
DNichols

An Arpaio "Roast" should resemble the Mike Tyson roast, they both share the same I.Q.'s, except Arpaio's eyes roll when he is trying to think.

Billy Hagstrom
Billy Hagstrom

They need someone who can do the job properly. Dump this assclown and his cohorts.

Jesse Adams
Jesse Adams

He couldn't get Maricopa county to find the funds to add the little propeller to the top of that head piece?

Rudy Armijo-Pack
Rudy Armijo-Pack

How about: Joe Arpaio is such a big piece of shit that he avoids sand boxes for fear cats will bury him. (rimshot)

Caroline Maul
Caroline Maul

why would this crooked bastard even be considered a celebrity? Are they freakin insane to fuel this narcissists ego even more while he continues to funnel tax payers dollars for his personal interest schemes? Give me a break! He's not a sheriff. Never was. He only wanted to be a politician.

DNichols
DNichols

Roast#11:

Deputy Hendershot, is that a mouse in your pocket or are you just happy to see me again?

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

I wonder how tight the security will be just in case there are Canadians in the audience.

AND SIDEWALKS!

THERE WILL BE SIDEWALKS............OH NO SHERIFF JOE..............SIDEWALKS!


However will they protect him?

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

If anyone is curious about the charity here is what I found on the About Us page:

Nunc et magna nisi.Aliquam at erat in purus aliquet mollis. Fusce elementum velit vel dolor iaculis egestas. Maecenas ut nulla quis eros scelerisque posuere vel vitae nibh. Proin id condimentum sem. Morbi vitae dui in magna vestibulum suscipit vitae vel nunc. Integer ut risus nulla. malesuada tortor, nec scelerisque lorem mattis.

Quis eros scelerisque posuere vel vitae nibh. Proin id condimentum sem. Vestibulum suscipit vitae vel nunc. Integer ut risus nulla. malesuada tortor, nec scelerisque lorem mattis.

I hope that clears it up.

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

Mrs. Brewer definitely looks better with short hair. Her long, severely bleached locks just enhance the Grand Canyon look that she so lovingly sports these days.

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

Oh wow. This doesn't say much for the charity. I really want to dump the money for the VIP ticket but I think I will buy a couple bike tires, instead. I'm fairly sure MCSO folks wouldn't want me there anyway.

Is the Elderly Elected Official the best they could do? Pretty lame...

WhoKnows
WhoKnows topcommenter

I don't  think that Yippy should be biting the ankles at anyone that says a bad thing about MCSO at this roast, as that could spread rabies....

"Yip, yip, yip!  MCSO is great!  Yip, yip, yip!"

WhoKnows
WhoKnows topcommenter

@TommyCollins Maybe I missed it, but what "Charity" is this roast for?

"Sun City Idiots that can no longer drive their RVs", or "Sun City Morons for Government Waste"?

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

@Flyer9753 @TommyCollins In fairness, I looked at the photo on page 2 again. It was a very old photo of Mrs. Brewer, when her facial wrinkles were more 'wash' like than her current 'canyon' appearance....

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

@WhoKnows Click on the 'celebrity roast' link in the story. Then look at the board of directors. Nuff said.... they are taking the plecostomus because they can't apparently find any celebrities for 'their' cause, I would guess.

Flyer9753
Flyer9753 topcommenter

@WhoKnows @TommyCollins 

No kidding... I had not looked at the link before and now that I have.. I just lost a LOT of respect for Pratt

WhoKnows
WhoKnows topcommenter

@TommyCollins @WhoKnows   It's sad, as remember when Dave Pratt was just a crazy hippy, and the rest  of the names show me businesses I'll never visit, as they love a dirtball!

Flyer9753
Flyer9753 topcommenter

@TommyCollins 

lol - did you see the hair split yippy is trying to do on that thread?? Hilarious!

TommyCollins
TommyCollins topcommenter

@Flyer9753 @TommyCollins @WhoKnows    yup...

Now Trending

From the Vault

 

Loading...