No matter how many police reports we read through on a monthly basis, the criminal creativity, stupidity, and craziness never ceases to amaze us.
Just when you think you've seen it all, there's always something
worse. From a cocaine-thieving plastic surgeon, to a guy barfing on a dog and shooting its owner, to a drunk cop pulling a gun on someone, to a man very nearly getting his testicles ripped off, and more, we bring you the 10 craziest Phoenix-area crimes this month:
10.) Mesa Man Insists He Has a "Permit" for Bags of Meth
Police say that a Mesa man scaring people at a gas station was carrying several bags of (surprise!) meth with him at the time. The man, 38-year-old Nakia Laye, insisted to police that he had a permit for all that alleged meth. Of course, the main problem here is that there's no such thing as a meth permit. His only other excuse was, "Oh shit!," according to court records.
9.) DUI Suspect Tells Cops She's "Glad" Firefighters Who Died in Yarnell Hill Fire Were White
Merry Finley's encounter with police started around 10 p.m. on July 10, when she was pulled over on suspicion of driving drunk in Gilbert. She was arrested for that, and randomly noted that she's "happy when officers are hurt." As police finally processed Finely at the jail and released her into the lobby, Finley allegedly grabbed the door and slammed it into the officer, adding that she was glad the 19 firefighters killed in the Yarnell Hill Fire were white. Finley was escorted back into the jail for the alleged assault-by-door.
8.) Phoenix 8-Month-Old Dies After Being Burned with Lighter and "Violently" Shaken
After being hospitalized when she stopped breathing, doctors found at least eight separate burn marks on 10-month-old Sabrina Santos-Vasquez's face, body, and hands. Police say Adrian Ponce, who is not Sabrina's father, but is engaged to her mother, admitted to burning her with the open flame of a cigarette lighter. He then shook the girl later that night, while the girl wouldn't sleep and continued to cry -- presumably from all the burns, police say.
7.) DUI Suspect Passes Out While Driving; He Was Out So Long He Ran Out of Gas
Jason Taylor, 22, was found shortly after 5 a.m. one day by a newspaper deliveryman. Taylor was slumped over the steering wheel of his Jeep on a residential street near 23rd Avenue and Cactus Road. When asked what happened, Taylor replied, "I got drunk," records state. Police noted that the key was in the "on" position, and the car was in drive, leading cops to believe that Taylor's car ran out of gas at some point in the night. Taylor admitted to drinking a six-pack of beer (before
he drank an 18-pack of beer), according to police.