10 Strangest Things That Have Come Out of Jan Brewer's Mouth in the Last Year

jan-fox.jpg
via Fox News
Governor Jan Brewer, on the verge of saying something colossally dumb.
It has gotten to the point that the public is generally unfazed by Governor Jan Brewer's monumental struggles with the English language.

That includes earlier this week, when Brewer kind of expressed her support for the "Gang of Eight" immigration bill, and her press team spent the rest of the day explaining that she really didn't. But Brewer has enlightened the public much less on many more occasions -- check out our list of the 10 strangest things that have come out of Brewer's mouth over the last year (which doesn't include any physical objects, just words):

10.) Jan loves smiles

jan-brewer-awkward.jpg
Photo by Matthew Hendley
Brewer either didn't bring a speech to the Arizona Republican Party's election-viewing party in November, or she didn't really read it. After saying she wanted to get "Buh-rack Obama out of the White House," she appeared to run out of things to say.

"I love all of the smiles on all of your faces," Brewer said, followed by a pause, and look around the room. "Love it."

9.) Immigration reform is "a victory for Arizona"

brewer-ocho.jpg
via YouTube
Brewer was on Fox News just a couple days ago and was asked whether she thinks "what we're seeing now in the Senate" on immigration is good or bad.

"I think that what we're seeing taking place in the Senate is a victory for Arizona," Brewer responded.

Brewer was talking about something else, but failed to make that clear. She meant to say an amendment to spend more on border security was the victory, but confused watchers thought she endorsed the immigration bill, which she has since clarified she doesn't.

8.) Mostly incoherent rambling at the RNC



This one kind of needs to be heard for the full effect. This was Brewer's 30-second slot at the Republican National Convention, and there may have never been so many awkward things crammed into a 30-second speech before.

Some guy standing too close to the microphone informed the governor, "They love ya," as Brewer declared that Mitt Romney is a "westerner at heart," before muttering either "go west" or "good old west" -- which doesn't really make sense either way. She also tried to avoid saying that three of Arizona's delegates defected to Ron Paul, and it's a mild miracle that people clapped for any of it.

7.) Doing "something illegal" makes you "an illegal"

brewer-teeth.jpg
Brewer has probably the world's most nonsense defense of the phrase "illegal immigrant," a phrase that some see as degrading.

Brewer explained that doing something illegal makes you "an illegal," to which we noted that driving under the influence after a couple of glasses of scotch and rear-ending a minivan must not be illegal, or else Arizona apparently has "an illegal" for governor.

"To me they're illegal immigrants," Brewer told ABC News. "When you break the law, you're doing something illegal, that makes you an illegal, so they are illegal immigrants."

What?


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56 comments
Carl ToersBijns
Carl ToersBijns

that's how it works you do it often enough you desensitize the public and they don't care any longer. That's how they got the prison agenda to be so successful because nobody cares anymore.

Lorri Rupp-Woodmansee
Lorri Rupp-Woodmansee

Poor Jan. Despite her severe dementia they keep putting her in front of an audience and continue to pull her strings from the back.

Laird Creevy
Laird Creevy

"I don't always drink alcohol, but when I do, I inhale it".

James Thompson
James Thompson

I especially like the vacant stare in her eyes during her pauses. It's like her brain stops computing, and has to reboot. She is like an old alcoholic robot!

OATHKEEPER1958
OATHKEEPER1958

LOVE JAN BREWER!  SHE GETS BETTER WITH AGE EVERYEAR!

Boogie
Boogie

She is attractive for a woman her age and I am sure she was beautiful as a young woman, but she needs to stop with the hair and let herself grey naturally. She is not fooling anyone. She's old, and she needs to accept that. Aunt Flo left her buulding decades ago.

Tara Briscoe
Tara Briscoe

Between Brewer and Arpaio, I'm wondering, is a high school diploma required to run for office in the state of Arizona? Seems not.

wqcharleston
wqcharleston

I bet the least strangest thing that ever came out of Brewhilda's mouth is the vomit she spewed all over the floor of the Grand Resort after consuming 13 mixed drinks. Just say'n

DNichols
DNichols

Why don't you do an article on the "Ten Strangest things that have come out of Sheriff Babeu's mouth last year"?!

1. Jose

2. Jason

ect.

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

Hey Jaffy, Now you and Joe can come out of the closet. The Supreme Court legalized your love.

robert_graham
robert_graham

You people believe everything you read don't you? What a bunch of idiots you all are.

robert_graham
robert_graham

Rather, how about we talk about the ten strangest things that have come out of Matthew Hendley's mouth in the last year.

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

Try not to mistake what I say as being support for Brewer.  She's got no business in any elected position.

However some of her comments can be translated pretty easily into her actual meaning:

A person who does something illegal can usually be referred to as an "illegal .. something".  for example, if you park illegally, you can, grammatically, be called an "illegal parker".  A non-citizen who is here on a visa is commonly referred to by the media as a "legal alien", so it's perfectly logical that a non-citizen who is here illegally should be called an "illegal alien", which can be shortened to "illegal" in much the same way that we shorten "airplane" to "plane" in known contexts.


Her confusion about term limits has nothing to do with mathematical concepts, but with the definition of "term".  This is currently her first full term.  She only served a partial term the first time, and has only been elected once (which is at least once too many).  


robert_graham
robert_graham

@shadeaux14 It's not my love, it is yours!  Personally I think it's sick. Besides, for your information the court did not legalize it - they left it up to each State and Arizona will say NO!

car_del99
car_del99

@JoeArpaioFan How about we mwntion all of your stupidities ?  We would have to write a book !!!

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

@JoeArpaioFan  But, to be fair, he's paid to be controversial.

Brewer's only qualifications for being Governor are

a) she was Sec of State when Napolitano got the federal job she'd been waiting for

b) she didn't veto SB-1070


loboco76
loboco76

@valleynative thank you.  I was thinking much the same.   I think that many of her policy decisions are retarded, such as allowing fireworks in our dry desert state against the wishes of every major fire organization, or allowing anyone to concealed carry.... but those are her actual decisions, and I think that is something that can and should be debated. That's what politics is about.  

This business of dissecting her every statement is ridiculous. 

I think it is a sad statement on society when we spend more time looking at window dressing of how she phrases something than we do looking at her actual track record.  

williamkilburn
williamkilburn

@valleynative trying to explain how illegal immigrant might not be bigoted does not negate the fact we all know it is code for a nigger in the guise of a diluted wetback substitute. fifty years form now we will be begging for forgiveness from our Hispanic family members. thankfully they have the heart and tradition of caring enough for community to forgive us Whites who's greatest fear is the word honky or cracker. Illegal is a slam and Arpaio  is guilty of being a bigoted, sexist, Fascist, slimy pig and is most likely deeply involved in all types of organized crime including drugs, arms, prostitution, and racketeering. The political mask serves as a front, a mask, for his ruthless cruel Hittlerian  blood thirst. His only regret is he can build the tents but not the gas chambers, yet. PS Sickos like him usually have a major porn problem too. We'll see when the Feds are done with him, if he hasn't paid them off or black mailed them too.

JohnQ.Public
JohnQ.Public

@valleynative She is not confused about term limits at all - she knows exactly what the AZ Constitution means because Chuck Coughlin drew her pictures in crayon to explain it - she just doesn't like it, wants to fight against it and is too dumb to realize that it is not a fight she's going to win in public opinion, with the electorate or in court. 

The problem isn't that we can figure out what she is actually trying to say - the problem is that we have to decipher, or as you say translate, what she says into English so we can figure out what she is saying.  The point, and I understand you think she is an idiot too, is how fucking inarticulate she is particularly in light of the position she has achieved.  It does give me hope, however, when I tell me kids that they can be anything that they want to be that they really can achieve the Governorship of Arizona because we, apparently have such low standards.

robert_graham
robert_graham

@valleynative She most certainly does deserve to be in her elected position. You just don't like it because she doesn't pander to illegal aliens. Well, that's just too damn bad.

robert_graham
robert_graham

@valleynative Wanna know all the strangest things that Hendley has said in the last year? Too many to mention.

williamkilburn
williamkilburn

@JoeArpaioFan @shadeaux14 why do you think I am sick? I am fifty and my family and I both knew I was gay when I was ten. I grew up and had several successful relationships including one marriage to  a woman I loved. I love my Mother, care for the people in my life, pay my taxes, don't speed or hurt anyone. In general, just another guy who happens to be gay throughout his life. Not only is it not a crime, throughout history a flexible sexuality was the dominant norm. Repression by Islam and Catholicism ushered in the silly dark age beliefs of  strict male and female roles and shifted normal society from a more shared male and female flexibility to the bondage of repressed rigidity. Free yourself today. Seriously consider a sexuality course where you can safely explore the forces you feel inside you. If you do, your life may be revolutionized and not so dull. Woody Allen said that bisexuality was great because it doubled your chances of a date on Friday  night. If  you are alone on a Friday night this may be the answer.. And remember , you are not alone...when I occasionally endure some vanilla straight  traditional  love making it seems so yucky sometimes I want to take a shower. Lol. You are not alone.

DNichols
DNichols

I thought that Joe Arpaio's Fan was in jail for molesting three Children, including his own Daughter?!

Does he get use of the Internet in the Child Molester Block of the Jail?!

In any case Arpaio "Fans" are sick Bastards.

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

@williamkilburn  Arpaio is incompetent and a blowhard, but your entire view of the immigration debate is skewed insanely.  And I mean that literally.  You sound completely disconnected from reality.

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

@JohnQ.Public Keep in mind that she probably would never have made it this far even in Arizona if she had ever had to face a Primary election.

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@JohnQ.Public god bless Arizona, a state where things like Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome  cant keep you from achieving your dream of someday becoming "Gubnor"

wqcharleston
wqcharleston

@JoeArpaioFan @valleynative I think they should run a piece about the strangest things you have shoved up your azz, while screaming JOE JOE JOE give it to me hard fat boy

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

@JoeArpaioFan I generally don't have any problem with her stance on illegals.

What I object to is that she's a complete idiot.

It's possible to be against illegal immigration but still recognize that Brewer is an idiot and Joe is nothing but a blowhard showman who's not competent to run a large law enforcement agency.

robert_graham
robert_graham

@DNichols Hey watch it bozo, what you just said is slander. First of all I was not in jail and I don't have a daughter. Better watch what you say. 

There are lots of Joe Arpaio fans and we have you outnumbered!!!!

danzigsdaddy
danzigsdaddy topcommenter

@valleynative damn good post. unfortunately though it went right over JAFfy's head. his belief is that if you think Joe would rather spend more time in front of a camera instead of doing his job.....you just have to be pro-crime or pro-illegal immigration. if you think the pickled pig (the very same one who endorsed Obama at the RNC) is an idiot...........again, you just have got to be pro-illegal immigration. like i said, great post and most people agree with you, but with little Robert, you are wasting keyboard time

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