Fred Thompson Jokes About Gilbert Woman Running Over Husband, Is Insulting to Humor

Categories: Laugh Track
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gretawire.foxnewsinsider.com
Fred Thompson has zero good jokes.
Somehow, we found out today that former U.S. Senator and one-time awful presidential candidate Fred Thompson tells jokes on Twitter.

"AZ woman ran over husband w/ SUV because he didn't vote for Romney," one of Thompson's alleged jokes says. "Well, on the bright side, Obamacare covers treadmark removal."

See also:
-Man Run Over by Wife for Not Voting Against Obama May Be Permanently Disfigured

BOO-YA!

Take that, Daniel Solomon, the Gilbert man who may be permanently disfigured after being run over by his wife, who blamed him for President Obama's re-election.

If it weren't for occasionally appearing on television sets to con old people into buying things, we would've assumed Thompson had just given up on trying to entertain people.

However, now that we see he has a Twitter account, we can share with you how genuinely insulting Thompson's jokes are to the world of humor.

Below, find a few examples of Thompson's jokes, just from the past couple of weeks. Feel free to use this information to feel better about your own lame jokes, and make Thompson feel like an asshole.

  • PETA wins suit in NC to ban town's New Year's Eve Possum Drop. Event to be replaced by 1st Annual New Year's Eve Possum Cook-Off. 

  • Trend:removing dog's vocal chords to prevent barking. Why not turn off home security system so alarm doesn't wake you up at night, too

  • Pentagon: Iran jets fired on unarmed US Predator drone. Waiting for Obama to blame it on bootleg copy of "Top Gun" posted on YouTube.

  • Napolitano floated to replace Holder. She still won't prosecute Black Panthers, but she will run 'em through a naked body scanner.

  • Chinese restaurant robbery in FL fails b/c employees didn't speak English. Competitive world. Now even criminals need a good education 

  • BClinton: b/c of Obama, American military now "less racist, less sexist & less homophobic". Whoops! He forgot "less well-funded".

  • City of Aurora, IL removes >300 birds from local home. Turned out most were out-of-work air-testers from closed-down coal mines.

  • In Tampa, Obama's copy of his second term plan accidentally fell off his podium. Huh. Is he SURE it wasn't a suicide attempt?

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14 comments
godhatesdems
godhatesdems

I think she was just exercising her voting right.

chuck_h69
chuck_h69

Get a life!  If Fred Thompson's jokes are the best thing you can bring up to criticize someone about you've got too much time on your hands.  Fred Thompson is one of THE most intelligent human beings you'll find anywhere.   Yes the incident of the woman running over her husband is an unfortunate altercation between two people that is not really funny.  You see such things in children's cartoons all the time.  I think that is the way his joking about it was meant.  Just because he's a conservative people think they have license to portray him as some sort of monster.  Well I'm here to tell you it doesn't give you a license to do that.   Being a conservative is one THE most honorable and admirable things that one can be referred to as.  The way I see it is that smearing someone's good name because of a joke they told shows something devious about the criticizer.   If Fred Thompson had made it through the primaries when he ran for President he was who I wanted to vote for that election.  I'm just sorry I never got the opportunity.  I did vote for him in the primary.

Chuck Klee
Chuck Klee

I like that lady that ran her husband over...that's what he gets for voting for Obama.

AFewWereFunny
AFewWereFunny

At least Thompson is better at comedy than Hendley is at journalism...

Ron Pies
Ron Pies

Wasn't Fred suppose to be the Republican savior? How about Newt? Herman? Donald? Rick ? Rick ? Michelle? How about Miss Wasilla? No, it turned out to be Willard. How sad.

Warren Klofkorn
Warren Klofkorn

Who is this jackass? I've never seen him before. Perhaps I should be glad for not paying for cable TV?

Richie Barriga
Richie Barriga

i'm sure Fred Thompson is busting out his smartphone and sending out this comical streak of tweets at his age

MandyMountain
MandyMountain

Comedy is apparently not this man's strong suit. Among conservatives skillful comedians seem to be about as rare as hens' teeth. The only really funny one that I can think of right off the bat is PJ O'Rourke.

Warrior-X
Warrior-X

ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz.........the Repug bores me out. Stick with sipping Tea, pal. You're a politico thug, not a comedian. Or go join Jan for some shots of old yeller and bug off Fred.

AFewWereFunny
AFewWereFunny

 @redrock435 At least I read more than one sentence written by the person I was critiquing before passing summary judgement.  Nice try troll...

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