"Jesus Christ" and Warren Jeffs Co-Author a Letter Asking for Jeffs to Be Released From Prison

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funnychurchsigns.org
If Warren Jeffs -- pedophile/leader of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints -- had any marbles left when he was sent to prison, he just lost the rest of them.

Jeffs, who's in prison for sexually assaulting two underage "brides," wrote a petition to the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals -- allegedly co-authored by "Lord Jesus Christ" -- saying it's time for Jeffs to be released.

According to "Jesus Christ," he's going to be really pissed if Jeffs doesn't get out of prison "soon."

The FLDS headquarters of yore was based in Colorado City, along the Arizona/Utah border, but Jeffs moved the Church's headquarters to Texas after he faced criminal charges in Arizona.

After having a rape-related charge overturned in Utah, Jeffs was extradited to Texas to face charges for (you guessed it) raping kids, which he was convicted on and sentenced to life in prison.

Now, according to the revelations Jeffs says the "Lord Jesus Christ" delivered to him, it's apparently Jeffs' religious right to rape kids.

"Jesus Christ" claims "my servant Warren Jeffs [is] being held unjustly, by both intentional evil and lying ways, also by ignorance of this generation not knowing my full truth of religion being of constitutional protection for religious freedom," according to the letter obtained by the Salt Lake Tribune.

Jeffs' letter also asks for the rest of the FLDS members in prison to be released.

Apparently the wrong "Jesus Christ" is helping Jeffs write these letters, as the last time he tried this, he was denied due to procedural errors.

Read the letter authored by a convicted rapist and "Jesus Christ" below:



Also read: Former New Times writer John Dougherty's saga on the polygamist communities in Arizona.


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20 comments
bnohe
bnohe

That motion is pure comedic gold-- though it's oddly terrifying as well, if you consider that people have actually bought into his whole schtick.

Points for using Buddy Christ as an illustrating image, minus points for not crediting him properly. :P

katahdin
katahdin

I'm pretty sure Mormon believe that Jaysus is just another guy.

Steve
Steve

Wow, jesus is good with these bullet points. wonder which law school he did his undergrad work at?

Krzkt
Krzkt

I dunno.... I think it sounds like a threat. Normally the courts don't respond to "let this guy go or else". Maybe he should have promised everyone five acres and a mule instead of a threat of death and destruction for both North and S America. it seems like a bad legal tactic.. But then again, I'm not an expert on Texas legal precedent.

Richard
Richard

This isn't any crazier than the crap going on in AZ. Pearce out to suck more money out of the people gin and juice [duh] jan pushing for more prison beds crazy joey [you wascally wabbit] penile Peter giving blow jobs at rest areas .......what more could we want from OUR SERVANTS?

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Some Dude
Some Dude

If this isn't taking the lord's name in vain, I don't know what is. 

wherewasi
wherewasi

What's really sad is that there are thousands of people who think this guy is "leadership material".  Talk about a tainted gene pool.

Cynthia
Cynthia

I once met this guy when I was working in the Kingman area.  He made my skin crawl
and at that time I didn't know anything about Colorado City or the Jessop name sake.
If there is such a thing as evil possion...he fits the ticket. 

wherewasi
wherewasi

Well, if Jeffs is fried the next time he's allowed outside, we'll have our answer, now, won't we?  LOL!

wherewasi
wherewasi

ROTFL!

I wonder how one would go about verifying whether it was truly Jesus that wrote this, or if it was just a Holy Ghost writer?

wherewasi
wherewasi

And we thought the people who "see Jesus" in grilled cheese sandwiches, oil stains and wood grain on doors were loopy.

Did Jeffs ever try an insanity plea?  If not, he should!

Tubes Fan
Tubes Fan

Sorry Warren, Jeebus don't talk to kiddie rapers. If he did, a whole bunch of catholic priests would have beat you out the door.
Enjoy the rest of your shitty life in a cage, loser.

Native Guns
Native Guns

It's the "Cult Mentality" sickness, reminiscent to the zombies who support Joke and the MCSO. Blinded by fear, hate and xenophobia. I would liken them in the same boat.

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

I wonder who had to clean up after the Appeals court pissed them selves from laughing so hard at this lunatic.

Native Guns
Native Guns

"Did Jeffs ever try an insanity plea? If not, he should!"

That's a good point Liz. I was wondering the same thing.

Triple-6 Gun Mane
Triple-6 Gun Mane

 This piece really cracked me up. This is nothing but "religious" humor and hypocrisy from the "Holier Than Thou".

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