Arizona's Machine Gun Christmas in You Write the Caption

santagun.jpg
Scottsdale Gun Club
Your Caption Here
Nothing quite says "merry Christmas" like Santa and a few high-powered machine guns -- in Arizona, anyway.

In honor of the Scottsdale Gun Club's celebrating the holidays by giving people the chance to have holiday photos taken of their children holding machine guns, we've opted to go with the above photo of Arizona's machine gun Christmas for this week's New Times You Write the Caption contest.

Here's how you play You Write the Caption: We show you a picture (above) and you -- in the comment section of this post -- write what you think would be an appropriate caption.

On Monday, we'll announce the top-five reader captions and put them to a vote. The winner will receive a pay-your-own-way trip to the historic New Times building for a firm handshake and a lukewarm glass of Phoenix municipal tap water.

Do your worst, New Times readers
.

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41 comments
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Krishnaagriculturaltools

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Goldy1024
Goldy1024

 Which one will run for office next in AZ?

Peele_robert
Peele_robert

 A rat tat tat.. A rat tat tat.. Machine guns all the way! Oh what fun is to shoot  practicing to slay! HEY!

PTCGAZ
PTCGAZ

"Father Christmas, give us some moneyDon't mess around with those silly toys.We'll shoot you if you don't hand it overWe want your bread so don't make us annoyedGive all the toys to the little rich boys" A bastardized version of Father Christmas By the Kinks. Cleaver song, always makes me laugh.

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

I want an X-Box 360, an I-Pad, an I-Phone and I better get them or I bust a cap in your shorties.

MGH
MGH

For a modest fee, I'll see to it that nothing happens to your toy shop.

MGH
MGH

So... You're the guy who gave my wish list to WikiLeaks.

MGH
MGH

Go ahead. Make my toys.

MGH
MGH

It's the end for you, Santa. The boss said you never paid for last year's presents.

MGH
MGH

I'm here to negotiate better wages for the elves.

MGH
MGH

We have to be ready. We're at war with the Island of Misfit Toys.

MGH
MGH

This winter I hear the drummingFour dead in the North Pole

Enuf Istoomuch
Enuf Istoomuch

A rather silly exercise but hardly anything to get upset about.

MrP
MrP

Don't shoot your eye out kid.

Crud
Crud

He knows when you are sleeping! He knows when you're awake! He knows if you are bad or good! So be good for goodness sake! OR ELSE!!!

TiparilloPDX
TiparilloPDX

I heard the machine guns blaze on Christmas dayTheir old familiar rounds ricochetAnd wild and sweet the words repeatOf war and death, good will to none.

PTCGAZ
PTCGAZ

Santa how do I shoot this thing? just pull the trigger. Ok. BOOM Headshot. Little Boy blue shoots and kills Santa and his Dad..

Damooch99
Damooch99

Son, you always need a gun bigger than your penis. Remember that!

C Murphy Hebert
C Murphy Hebert

You'll shoot your eye out, you'll shoot your eye out. 

JoAnn Verdun
JoAnn Verdun

Watch out kids, Santa just took out the kids next door for being naughty!

MGH
MGH

Look Santa, I didn't come here for presents. Donner and Blitzen put out a contract on you.

Mrs Claus is a Ho!
Mrs Claus is a Ho!

Li'l Jimmy smiled for the camera right before he put a cap in Santa's fat ass for placing "effing" coal in his stocking, knocking his Mom up and eating all the cookies last year!

MGH
MGH

Tell the undertaker to get three cookies ready... My mistake. Four cookies.

MGH
MGH

Do you feel lucky? Well, do ya, Nick?

MGH
MGH

There are two kinds of people in this world. Those with machine guns and those who deliver presents. You deliver presents.

MGH
MGH

I know what you're thinking... Did he deliver six presents or only five? 

Ross
Ross

 ‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,Not a creature was stirring, we had offed every mouse.When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.Grabbing my Uzi, I took careful aim,What a rush, it was, to kill flying game.Die, Dasher! Die, Dancer! Die, Prancer and Vixen!Die, Comet! Die, Cupid! Bye bye, Donner and Blitzen!As I drew in my head, and was turning around,Down the chimney some illegal came with a bound.He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,And I laughed when I shot him, in spite of myself!A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,Soon gave me to know that he soon would be dead.I heard him exclaim, while I watched him expire,“But Arpaio assured me, you’d  hold your fire!”

Eleanor Holguin
Eleanor Holguin

Where's that damn reindeer that ran over Grandma?  I'm gonna shoot it!!

Painful Rectal Itch
Painful Rectal Itch

Santa: "Ho Ho Ho...and what would you like for Christmas this year Timmy?"Timmy:  "Well, first of all, I need a new dad.  I mean look at this guy.  What kind of macho dick puts his child through something like this?  Second, I'd like to shove this M-203 right up your consumerist, corporate-shill poop chute although, in the spirit of the season, I should probably remove the grenade launcher first.  Is that it?  Are we done?"  

MGH
MGH

Go ahead. Make my holiday.

Toad51560
Toad51560

Rudolf makes a good target Santa.

Jason
Jason

Only in Arizona!!

maybe368
maybe368

This is the last time this guy calls my wife a Ho...

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

Nothing says "Peace on Earth"  like a fully automatic AR-15.

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