Morning Poll: Best Reader Caption for Photo of Joe Arpaio, J.D. Hayworth, and Russell Pearce

hell.jpg
J.D. Hayworth's Facebook page
Last week, we asked our readers to offer suggestions for a caption for the above photo of Senate President (for now) Russell Pearce, Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio, and former TV pitchman J.D. Hayworth in our first installment of our You Write the Caption contest.

You didn't disappoint.

We had nearly 100 responses in the comment section of the post, which you can see by clicking here.

We've narrowed it down to five finalists, but only one can win the grand prize: a pay-your-own-way trip to the historic New Times building, and a lukewarm glass of Phoenix's municipal tap water (just for you RetiredArmy).

The finalists are as follows:

A) Lazik11 with "Behind us here, most would see a wall. Not us. What we see is a political opportunity to exploit."

B) Pit Boss with "I can't believe we've been doing the Weekend at Bernies thing for 2 years now with this sheriff. I'm not carrying him back to the car, Russel, it's your turn."

C) Tommy Collins with "The shurf appears pregnant. Which of those two is the father?"

D) Lazik11 with "Now Joe, you can't just wander out of the house like this.  You had Eva
all worried. It is a good thing Russ and I found you.  Did you forget to take your pills yesterday?  Russ, radio J.T. and let him know we found Joe in the desert again...oh and I think he need a fresh Depends."

E) Gerry C with "The Belly Patrol."

Cast your vote for the winner of New Times' You Write the Caption contest below.



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46 comments
Gerry_C
Gerry_C

Not a caption, but one could confuse the "three" of them with David Hendershott, speaking relative to bulk that is. 

Ranger
Ranger

Three legal American citizens at the fence. Figure the odds on that.

Hock
Hock

Guess which had gastric bypass surgery, and which two have not?

Not surprised
Not surprised

They were all great posts!  But Lazik has my vote with A.   Hard hitting truth with a twist of humor.

Eleanor
Eleanor

These are all really great.  I voted for d because it made me laugh the most.  I can always use a good laugh......sometimes you just gotta laugh at this shit and shake your head and keep working to change it.

RetiredArmy
RetiredArmy

That was hard. They are all good. I voted for "A" because it was a photo op on the tax payers dime. Who paid for the gas? Who paid for that vehicle?  How far out of Joes jurisdiction where they? If the state and county have enough money to pay for this junket then they have enough money to fully fund our schools and services to the physically and mentally disabled. Due to the actions of Russell Pearce with the support of the other two clowns in that photo, people are loosing their jobs and getting their pay cut(like my wife, so yes this is personal) because supposedly the state is broke. Where are the so called conservatives complaining of government waste? What a joke the Republican ideals of conservative based morality have become. It’s been replaced with greed. I got mine and screw everybody else.

Oh and who ever wins please don’t hate me for suggesting the water. I suggest that you let it stand for a few minutes until that odor goes away, then find the nearest potted plant and dump it in when no one is looking.

Lazik11
Lazik11

Thank you for your support Mr. Tommy Collins.  The See no evil, Hear no evil, Speak no evil monkey trio really inspired me. 

Tommy Collins
Tommy Collins

I voted for (A). The purpose of their visit and the photo opportunity was nothing more than publicity and vote getting for all three. The photo simply is intended to appeal to the ignorant, mentally myopic, research challenged, egotistic Arizona voters who can't pee without instructions from the Republican party.

Yes, it is indeed intended as a political opportunity.

(All that said, the shurf does look like he might be carrying a baby.)

Lazik11
Lazik11

You sound like Johnny Cash at Folsom Prison, refering to his glass of tap water in the movie Walk The Line. Classic

shadeaux14
shadeaux14

Agree completely RA,but I don't think the cons in this state will ever do anything to improve the education system  because the only way they can stay in power is to have an ignorant electorate. Rpieholes 18 yr stint as sheriff is proof positive that this strategy works for them.

KEEP THEM STUPID AND THEY'LL KEEP VOTING FOR US.-----The Az CONservative motto.

Tommy Collins
Tommy Collins

Don't call me Mr.

It makes me feel as old as I really am... but thanks.. I had wondered how you were inspired...

Tommy Collins
Tommy Collins

Wait a sec. May I take back my vote for (A) and vote for (C) instead? I REALLY want the tour of the NT and I have found over the years NOTHING can compare to a glass of tepid water delivered to your tap in Phoenix. :-)

RetiredArmy
RetiredArmy

Wow I hadn't even thought of that. I've seen that movie and you make me proud to have been thought of in the same context as Johnny Cash one of my all time favorite singer songwriters and people.

As far as water goes, Phoenix's water isn't the worst I've had. I think that honor would go to the water that came out of the water buffalo when I was in Saudi Arabia during Gulf War One. The smell of chlorine was over powering and it didn't matter what you put in it it didn't go away. I think they where using two to one chlorine to water, I don't know, I just know it tasted nasty and it was all we had.

RetiredArmy
RetiredArmy

One of the things that gets under my skin about education funding is the fact that Joe Arpaio,  Russell Pearce, and J.D. Hayworth all get a significant amount of support from places like Sun City. Sun City is a school tax exempt zone and does not have any of their property taxes applied to the many schools that are within stones throw of that community. So instead of paying a few extra nickels in taxes too fund an education system that will produce productive motivated citizens, they pay big bucks for the lawsuits and for profit prisons to house the disfranchised uneducated youth that we seem to be producing in big parts of this state. But these guys, and what seems like a majority of the Greedy Oppressive Pricks that run this state want to keep it that way. I mean their benefiting, those "campaign"  checks from CCA and others keep showing up.

SON of SAM
SON of SAM

Kinda like Mistalee. Which I believe translates to Mr. Lee.

RetiredArmy
RetiredArmy

No, never was a First Sargent but served as NCOIC in various capacities. I also spent my childhood as an Air Force brat traveling the world from Europe to the Far East. I went from first to sixth grade in DOD schools around the world where civics and citizenship where primary subjects. I'm no model citizen by far, but to profit off the misery and misfortune of others, to limit opportunities for the children by cutting education funding, to take away life giving heath-care for the sick and dieing, and reducing the quality of life for those citizens who through no fault of their own can not provide for them selves, is about as far away as you can get from the values of citizenship I grew up being taught. So maybe it's my emotions or maybe it's the PTSD kicking in, but I just feel a need to call Bull Shit on the Bull Shitters

Tommy Collins
Tommy Collins

Just curious, are you a retired First Shirt? Your writings remind me of some of my former leaders.... I finished my three year commitment in 1970... and was R.A....

Emotion is good. I'm glad your wife is so committed to working with the disabled. Please tell her for me, as the grandfather of an Angelman's child, that every cent she makes is only a small pittance of what she deserves.

RetiredArmy
RetiredArmy

Yes I admit, I was having an emotional moment when I wrote that.I had just watched my wife leave for work, who works her ass off providing quality of life to the severely disabled. She has had her pay cut around 12% in the last year because of Russell Pearce and the so called right to lifers in state government. I never thought I'd see the day when she would question whether what she was doing was worth it. She has never done it for the money, lord knows, you'll never get rich working with the disabled in Arizona. So when I see these fat fucks using the tax payers money for their own personal benefit it makes me sick.

And yes I do remember when RA meant Regular Army. I enlisted in 1971 and in basic training before we could get our chow, we would have to run the obstacle course and then when we got to the head of the line we had to shout our name and RA or US.

Tommy Collins
Tommy Collins

R.A., I think you had an emotional moment. Which caption did you vote for? Remember when R.A. meant Regular Army and U.S. meant drafted?

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