Pot Users Who Still Have Two Brain Cells to Rub Together Should Try to Obtain Medical Marijuana Card

Categories: Medical Weed

 

id hit it art 1.JPG
Photo Illustration: New Times
​If you ever smoke or use marijuana, it's time to see the doctor.

The Arizona Medical Marijuana Act is the law of the land, and now the state Department of Health Services has provided a map to legal immunity for anyone interested in possessing pot. The final rules from the DHS spell out exactly need to be done to obtain a recommendation from a doctor for a state medical-marijuana card.

Sure, Arizona's program is less liberal than California's, where people legally use marijuana for ailments as relatively minor as anxiety or insomnia. Our law's criteria for who qualifies is stricter, and some potential applicants are already getting turned down for recommendations by physicians.

Those with legit medical problems certainly owe it themselves to give pot a try, especially if they've tried heavier, opiate-based pain or anti-nausea medications.

But beyond that, potheads, stoners, or occasional burners would be crazy, or stupid, not to at least try to obtain a card.

Getting busted with any amount of marijuana is a felony in Arizona. You'll be arrested and possibly taken to jail. If you're convicted -- welcome to your new life as an ex-con with a rap sheet (albeit a minor one).

If you have a card, though, you won't be arrested. You won't be convicted. Indeed, in many cases you'll be allowed to keep your marijuana and continue using it.

Capiche?

 Let's put it another way: If you end up busted this time next year and you didn't even try to get your card, you'll have screwed yourself.

Forget what state officials have been saying about wanting to keep non-patient or "recreational" users from legally possessing marijuana. This is your life we're talking about. Do you think Obama, George W., or Bill Clinton would have gotten to be president if they'd gotten busted? Hell, no.

So don't you get busted either -- get legal. Or try to get legal, anyway. We don't want to encourage you to lie, but you probably have some pain issues, don't you?

You heard it might be tougher if you're 25 and have never seen a doctor in your life? Find out for yourself. The worst that could happen is you'll be out a few bucks for the doctor visit.

Of course, any pot user who's been seeing a doctor for chronic pain regularly but fails to obtain the card would be a complete bonehead. Would it make sense for a law-abiding driver to never seek a driver's license? Why steal a book you want to read from the library instead of getting a library card?

Okay, now that we've convinced you, here's what to do:

Find the right doctor. Ask your regular physician or find one of the local doctors who are turning marijuana recommendations into a cottage industry. We hear that some even advertise in New Times

The doctor will ask for your medical records and history and charge you a fee. Some outfits will handle the whole process for you, including submitting the state application.

After April 14, you can submit your application online. You'll submit the $150 fee with a payment card, attaching a photo and your doctor's recommendation with associated records. (It's only $75 if you're on food stamps.) You can find all the necessary forms and FAQs on the DHS' website.

Don't procrastinate, either. While it's true that the dispensaries won't open with their products until the fall, having your card makes it legal for you to possess up to 2 1/2 ounces immediately, no matter where it came from.

The choice is yours, and it's simple: handcuffs and jail, or "you're free to go."

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30 comments
Obtain Medical Records
Obtain Medical Records

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Canadian Visitor
Canadian Visitor

I have Endometrosis and Pot is the only thing that does not kill my stomache and helps the anxiety and tension associated with this.

I have a Compassion Card from Vancouver, BC...can I use this card in Arizona once it is all a go??

Ric Romley
Ric Romley

Since the state considers the presence of any metabolites from THC in a suspect's blood prima facie evidence of impairment, won't possession of a MM card be grounds to arrest any card-carrying driver for DUI?

Tom
Tom

Legalize and tax it period. Revenue for the state and a hit on the cartel's wallet.

Info
Info

Get legal now for $99. We have physicians available across Arizona to certify you to use medical marijuana. Call to see if you qualify. (877) 511-0133 www.azmedcard.com

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Mistalee
Mistalee

Ray, your headline falsely implies that recreational cannabis use causes organic brain damage.

Maybe stoners with two brain cells to rub together should assist you with your copy.

Ray Stern
Ray Stern

Awww... where's your sense of humor? You out of pot?

Mistalee
Mistalee

I've been out of pot for years. Voluntarily. Not because of pot-related health risks, but because of cop-related health risks. Pot is medically benign, but the police are armed and dangerous.

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I have been eating and cutting medical peyote in the desert here since 1974. and its free if you know where to look. why pay for something when you can get it for free?

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teknik1200
teknik1200

Is chronic pain a viable reason in AZ? I know it isn't very effective against real pain but it is the best way to get a full nights sleep in regards to the pain. Is something like scoliosis a condition which would get someone approved?

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Walter Concrete
Walter Concrete

Regardless of how you feel about smoking pot, New Times is encouraging those with no legally approved medical condition to obtain a state license in order to avoid being arrested for the possession of pot. That's against the spirit of the law and irresponsible on their part. The best way not to get arrested for possession of pot is to not possess it...fairly simple. How many bags did you go through to think up this one Ray?

Pit Boss
Pit Boss

It's aimed at current pot users. And I agree with him. Unless they reduce the penalties in this state to anything but a $10-$100 fine, people SHOULD do what they can to dupe the system. Is it fair that a gram of pot can ruin a person's life and leave a permanent criminal scar on his or her record?

I think we need to legalize it outright already, enough with the medical stuff. It' VERY easy to test for recent usage of pot with an oral swab test, so LEOs can detect it the same as alcohol.

Walter Concrete
Walter Concrete

I think it should be legalized also. I just disagree with New Times juvenile attempt to coerce pot smokers to circumvent the law by breaking the law. So, it would O.K. with you if smokers recieved a medical card by deceiving a doctor in order to smoke pot and not get arrested? That my friend is illegal and although I do not agree with all laws I do disagree with New Times attempt to sell this hair brained idea which would put people in jail. It's half assed backwards logic on their part and I don't think it's a serious article. Hell, why not sell the doctor on some other ailments you don't have in order to obtain a prescription for morphine or speed? Beause if you want it you should have it!

AZCS CEO
AZCS CEO

while it CAN be detected similar to alcohol, the concentrate levels for humans and cannabis consumption have yet to be established therefore any TEST for THC to determine an impairment can easily be beaten in a court of law. Considering the new law allows a user to consume 5 grams daily, every day, without going over their legal limit or violating any state laws. 5 grams a day for a month is going to cause the user to have very high levels of concentrated THC in their system, even though they may NOT have used that day. So testing is out the window for thc folks, at least for now. Until a concentration level scale cab be established there is no basis for interpretation law to become case law.

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J Curwen
J Curwen

This, people, this. Take it from me, a felony pot rap, regardless of whether you do time for it, is no laughing matter. I've been living with a record for pot for over three decades. I can't say it's been Hell, but it sure had made a lot of things more difficult.

Loosecannonsbluesband
Loosecannonsbluesband

My wife is a teacher but has migranes that are treated successfully with pot (and only pot - believe me she's tried ALL the pharmaceuticals). She is afraid of what will turn up in a security clearance check that all teachers are required to go through (fingerprint cards, search of records, etc. etc.). Why are HIPPA regulations being subverted by the State of Arizona's regulations requiring a photo to be filed? Should not the only thing that matter be the Doctor's recommendation? Why is a "card" necessary when one already has a Doctor's recommendation?

AZCS CEO
AZCS CEO

according to the law no "licensing board, bureau or agency may impose penalties for someone being a qualified patient. I know doctors themselves that have come to our center to get certified folks. If that doesn't clear the air not sure what will ;) there can be no discrimination with the exception of those that receive federal funding directly.

read the law, its our now

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