Facebook.com/spencetheband

Dear Spence,

When your singer, who goes by the name of Daniel David Spence on Facebook, first approached me on Facebook to become my "friend," I strongly considered accepting his request to friend me. After all, I work in digital marketing as a social media strategist, and I accept everyone who requests me -- the first time, at least. And, I mean, look at that profile picture -- it's almost like Pete Wentz reincarnated, and at the time you first requested me, Fall Out Boy was defunct.

I was missing the black hair dyed and flat-ironed look.

But, alas, I received two eerily similar Facebook messages from him in a row. This didn't seem like a genuine request for my precious friendship -- I smelled something that reeked of processed meat.

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Azealia Banks

New Orleans bounce queen Big Freedia opened recent track, "Almost Famous, with a succinct and powerful line: "I'd like to thank all my fans /And all my haters /For making me famous."

Beef is beneficial for both parties involved: Music outlets love covering it, fans love chiming in, and any collateral damage to dignity or self-respect can be dealt with later. Just because "haters gonna hate" doesn't mean one mustn't respond in full, no matter how insipid, juvenile, or dull the affront to one's music or style. In this edition of "Beef," we join in the spirit of shallow bickering, rounding up a few of the music industry's latest races to the bottom.

Let's rumble:

"Gucci Gucci" viral star Keayshawn and brand new Universal Music signee Azealia Banks discovered there's no better place to manufacture beef than Twitter. Earlier this month, Kreayshawn actually gave props to Banks and tweeted a link to Banks' newest music video. The offense? The version of the video she tweeted was hosted on a porn website. D'oh!

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Yesterday, Pitchfork did an interview with experimental musician John Maus as part of their Guest List series. Most of the interview was typical stuff from the column, with Maus riffing on his love of South Park, Odd Future, Panda Bear, and Ariel Pink.

Things took a weird turn, however, when the question of Maus' favorite record store came up. Here's what he said:

"You don't know how happy it makes me that the days of the record store are coming to an end. $20 for an LP? Do you remember going to the record store and not getting what you want because there was no other place to get it? Now we can get it all for free, and I think that's wonderful. There was always something really depressing to me about record stores and music equipment stores. There's something oppressive about them, like the guy who looks you up and down and looks at what you're buying. You're bound up in exchange with the snobby clerk. So I'm glad they all have little "closed" signs on their doors now."

As you can imagine, folks at indie record stores didn't take the slight lightly. Enter Valley store Stinkweeds.

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