The 10 Biggest Douchebags in Country Music

Categories: Funny, Lists

3. Florida Georgia Line
Their first song, "Cruise," was a sublime summer jam. But then they went and recruited Nelly for the remix, copped Chesney's sleeveless look, and enlisted Luke Bryan for the year's most insufferable single, "This Is How We Roll." Country plus rap typically equals crap, and these guys prove it.

Courtesy of the label
Luke Bryan

2. Luke Bryan
The pretty-faced, nasal-voiced standard-bearer for bro-country, Bryan puts out a spring break-themed EP every year and dutifully plays a free annual show for blacked-out throngs of Florida revelers who are unlikely to remember a single verse. While he's only a collaborator on Florida Georgia Line's "This Is How We Roll," Bryan's own "That's My Kind of Night" was accurately lambasted by Zac Brown as the worst song ever -- although Bryan's breakout 2011 hit, "Country Girl (Shake It for Me)," gives it a run for its money. Also, he recently fell off the stage while covering a Macklemore song in concert. Nice one, bro. Not the fall, the fact that he was covering Macklemore in the first place.

country-bags-9.1-rascal-flatts-courtesy-of-label.jpg
Courtesy of the label
Rascal Flatts

1. Rascal Flatts
This aging boy band pours gas on the fire for critics of country radio every time they open their manscaped mouths. Gary LeVox's Mariah-like runs bear no resemblance to how a country artist is supposed to sing, and you've never seen a musician eye-fuck a camera until you've seen guitarist Joe Don Rooney optically jizz into the frame.

In case you're wondering, Hunter Hayes and Keith Urban are spared the guillotine because they can really shred on guitar.

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120 comments
Ryan Tielking
Ryan Tielking

Country is fucked right now and about 50-60% was right on but they missed a bunch a and put the wrong candidates in..

Katie Ann Perkins
Katie Ann Perkins

This article is bullshit. Especially if Garth is on here. Waste of time reading. The author is clearly not a country music fan so he's going to put everyone on there.

Garrett May
Garrett May

You play country music? You a douchebag, and that is a scientific fact!

Aaron Solloway
Aaron Solloway

Ironically nobody cares that you hate Abby for hating country music Lisa Obama. Shut up and sit in AZ you troll.

Todd Landram Slagowski
Todd Landram Slagowski

Up in Salt Lake City, before he was known, he treated people like crap. And look out women, you were his for the taking....

lisa cortese
lisa cortese

Ironically nobody cares that you hate country music.

Scott Aring
Scott Aring

So, clearly the writer of this article is the top douchebag. It's funny how those that can't, bitch. This guy even admits on a couple of these people that they have good songs, but then proceeds to attack them for doing what they do. I don't like some of the songs or artists of this list, but they are still better than this guy.

Andrea Svechovsky
Andrea Svechovsky

Aww, she's just butt hurt just bc she tried to prove a point but failed.

Jenn Boughton
Jenn Boughton

Fuck off? Very mature . Keep expressing your biased and ignorant opinions and telling people you don't know to fuck off, you're just aiding in the problem with the world. Good luck to you all.

Warren Klofkorn
Warren Klofkorn

"We got both kinds of music here, country AND western!"

Michelle Diaz de Leon
Michelle Diaz de Leon

Jenn, welcome to the Internet where people express their opinions all the time. Your statement is very ironic so I will say to you if you don't like her opinion then ignore it. Butt hurt much?

Andrea Svechovsky
Andrea Svechovsky

Billy Currington - terroristic threats and abuse of an elder. Rodney Atkins - domestic assault (against his wife) Randy Travis - drinking in a church parking lot. Uncle Kracker - 2nd degree forcible sex offense. ... I'm sorry, what was that Jenn?

Jenn Boughton
Jenn Boughton

How did Jason Aldean not make this list but you put Garth Brooks, one of the legends of country music, on this list. At the end of the day, country music is far from douchebags because they are not scum bags who beat their wives, steal, lie, and cheat; unlike artists in other genres. The only one that should have made this list is Jason Aldean as he made news for being, A DOUCHE

Jenn Boughton
Jenn Boughton

Welcome to the 21st century. If you don't like country then don't listen to it. You don't need to bad mouth something because you don't like it, that shows us that you are the true douche

James Mitchell
James Mitchell

I would imagine this could have easily been the 100 biggest douche bags. In fact, it would be much more difficult trying to figure out the top 10 country musicians who are not douche bags

Andrea Svechovsky
Andrea Svechovsky

Anyone who performs that awful excuse for music is a doucebag in my book.

Brecken Celis Iupeli
Brecken Celis Iupeli

This was hilarious!! And so true! I was glad to see Jason Aldean didn't make the list, but I wouldn't have been surprised if he had!

Alex Beeshligaii
Alex Beeshligaii

All of these ..wouldn't buy a ticket nor invest in their music..call em rockers!

JoAn Notah
JoAn Notah

Don't waste your time, like I did, reading this article. #useless

Colin Kelton
Colin Kelton

and yet like brian still won best country music artist of the year last year.. genera is changing that for sure!

Doug Neal
Doug Neal

Who gives a shit? Its bad country music.

Carl Schultz
Carl Schultz

You missed a bunch of them, but it's a good start.

Missy Goldin
Missy Goldin

So much negativity so early on a beautiful Monday morning.

Randell
Randell

What about Mark Wills?

COMPLETE douchbag.

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Megan Cole
Megan Cole

"Chris Cagle?" If that's even how you spell it, my cousin meets him asks "can I take a picture with you?" His response "do you even know who I am?" She came home and told me this and I just laughed.

lisa cortese
lisa cortese

Don't put Garth on this list. Mike Seely is the real douchebag here.

Hannah Jo Lally
Hannah Jo Lally

Thank you for re-posting this! #murderonmusicrow #wehatepopcountry #popcountrysucks

modelcitizen10
modelcitizen10

I see you're a real critical thinker and nobody that disagrees with you could be worthwhile, right? Pinhead. 


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