Here Are Five Songs at the Bottom of the Charts When the Beatles Made History

In case you haven't noticed, since Oct. 6, 2012 (the 50th anniversary of the release of "Love Me Do"), we've been on a half-century celebration cycle in which we are scheduled to relive every Beatles innovation, every release of the Beatles' landmark career in real time, right until the inevitable 50th anniversary of their breakup in 2020. Until that day comes, no day will pass that isn't The 50th Anniversary of Something.

Myself, I'm of the opinion that people who don't like the Beatles probably don't like kittens and Christmas and schnitzel with noodles, but I can see the haters' point of view on one thing. Every news cycle devoted to a 50-year-old group that is no more takes coverage away from breaking new artists. But I'm even more concerned about those other artists who had the misfortune of having a career the same time that the Beatles were rewriting the rule books. Those bandleaders who had to go toe-to-toe with the Beatles every day on every release only to still come out second best. If the 50th anniversary of the almighty Rolling Stones' first album came and went this week without so much as a cork popped, what hope is there for artists even lower on the food chain? Are they doomed to get eclipsed again, 50 years later?

It is in the interest of pointing out these parallel achievements to the Beatles that we are beginning a historical feature we are calling (cue thunderous music) The 50th Anniversary of Something Else!!

Two weeks ago, on April 4, we were reminded of the Beatles' historic takeover of the top five positions on Billboard's Top 100 with an additional nine Top 100 hits zooming up to meet them. It is a monumental achievement that no one -- not Mariah, not Boyz II Men, not Miley Cyrus -- is ever in any danger of repeating.

Those five songs? Starting with number one, they were "Can't Buy Me Love," "Twist and Shout," "She Loves You," "I Want to Hold Your Hand," and "Please Please Me."

But does anybody even know which American artists held the bottom five slots of that same British-blockaded Top 100 that same week? Yeah, I thought so. So here they are, in order of downward descent:

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