10 Weird Things about Bar Rescue's Rocky Point Cantina Episode

Rocky Point Cantina bar Odd Future
Benjamin Leatherman
Odd Future's afterparty at Rocky Point Cantina back in 2012.
You didn't have to spend a lot of time at beleaguered metal bar Rocky Point Cantina to be interested in the way it went under. Thankfully, you don't have to be a regular viewer of SpikeTV's Bar Rescue, either.

After looking set to fall off the schedule, Bar Rescue's trip to Tempe finally aired Sunday night at 10. We watched it, so that you wouldn't have to; here, roughly, are the 10 weirdest things about it that we noticed. We'll spot you the big one: Far from being rescued, the bar no longer exists.

1. The story the opening tells about Rocky Point Cantina might be accurate, but if it is it's an incredibly bizarre one. First, manager Scott Massimiano's parents decide to invest their retirement nest egg into a bar, which seems like an obviously risky (and inherently bad) idea. Next, it suggests that Massimiano's pitch to attract college students is bringing in heavy metal bands, which--whatever your opinion of metal--seems like a weird anachronism, whether it's the venue's or the TV show's.

2. It's really jarring how obviously stagey so much of the show is--all the Command Center banter in the SUV, the worst-case scenario scene they staged for the first night, the timer in the corner of the screen. It's like a bad police procedural, only much cheaper and dependent on the humiliation (and then redemption) of actual people.

3. Actual people who might deserve it, sure. If the story the show tells is true, they needed something drastic, and they probably would have closed anyway. (Although it was only thanks to Bar Rescue's own negligence that we learned they were operating against City of Tempe regulations already.)

4. This show is a master class in Unnecessary Deep-Voice Narration: "Without cash registers, no transactions can take place."

5. Their "Expert Mixologist" is a fantastic argument against expert mixologists--it has nothing to do with him in particular, just the skills of his trade, which consistently force him to resemble a Vegas-musician-turned-pick-up-artist-turned-guy-who-lives-inside-that-Tom-Cruise-movie. I will give Anthony, the show's Bad Bartender, an uncut sheet of crisp $2 bills if he promises never to spin glasses around on his shoulders like a Harlem Globetrotter or breathe fire.

An expert mixologist's moves are by nature weirdly abbreviated-looking on TV, probably because he isn't able to end them by telling a 17-year-old girl with a fake ID about how many famous people he knows.

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17 comments
ellerae
ellerae

wow. this is an incredible amount of utter b.s.

first, mr. moore, please actually watch more than one show. second, do your freakin' journalistic duty and do some research!! each one of your points were as lacking in substance as the crap talking heads on fox news spout during an election. clearly, you're just looking for a check.

every.single.one of those dumbass points were slanderous. but they also explain why you're on here spouting your vitriole and not writing for a reputable entity. *shrugs* guess you gotta eat, but how do you SLEEP at night? pathetic.

and to all those going off about "i've been in the industry for so-and-so years, and jon taffer doesn't know shit," he's the one on t.v. we all know HIS name. who the hell are you?

y'all need to get a life.

nonayerdayumbidnuz
nonayerdayumbidnuz

I spent over 25 years in the bar business, and I assure you, John Taffer doesn't know shit about the industry.

beverly.newton14
beverly.newton14

I hate to hear what happened to u guys it's just awful. U r in my prayers and I hope u have filed a lawsuit against bar rescue for compensation.

Tim Montague
Tim Montague

As a bar owner I can tell you there is nothing and I mean nothing easy about running a bar. Taffer wasn't against metal. He simply stated that the metal bar customers were not spending money and no bar can stay in business when your paying a band and the customers that come see the band are not spending money. I thought Taffer's direction he took the bar was a good one, it's a really cool space. However you can have the coolest place in town with the best bands, but if it's poorly run it's not going to make it no matter how cool it is. There is no way a place that big could run and provide great customer service with one bartender and one cook. I think the guy who wrote this article is way off base and needs to understand what it takes to run a bar before he writes about Jon Taffer bad decisions. Neither one of the sons had any experience in the bar business. That's FAIL before you even open the doors.

Kelly Remaklus Mahoney
Kelly Remaklus Mahoney

Bar Rescue is not fully to blame for the failure. Kids need to step up and take responsibility for their failures. It's obvious these rich kids have no respect for their parents, the success of their business or for the ideas presented that could have potentially saved the business.

MsMahoney
MsMahoney

If you have any sense, you will realize that the show and Jon are not to blame for the bars demise. The owners are.Jon came up with a cool theme and did everything to prepare for the bars success (except file the name permits which the owners should have done). Jon recommended that the bar focus away from the heavy metal scene,but the owners didn't listen. So how can Jon be blamedfor the owners stupidity? Other bars on Bar Rescuehave turned around because of the show.

khuntington1969
khuntington1969

If the staff is quick and friendly and the entertainment is good any bar can be successful. 

hotwheels68
hotwheels68

@nonayerdayumbidnuz  I spent over 30 years in the bar business, and I assure you, John Taffer does know everything about the industry and how to run a business.

furiousstrength
furiousstrength

Compensation for what? They didn't ruin the bar, it was negligent management. Their permits weren't good BEFORE Bar Rescue got there.

beverly.newton14
beverly.newton14

U have a point but surely taffer and his crew had since to know permits were required and should have updated their selves about the cities codes

furiousstrength
furiousstrength

It's the owners job to file those permits. The permits didn't go through because they weren't up to date in the first place. Regardless, that is one tiny issue compared to the fact the management and choice in bands was killing the place. They were for sure going to go out of business before Bar Rescue got there, so why they'd go back to the same thing is beyond me. It's just plain stupid.

It's pretty obvious the writer of this article doesn't know what he's talking about and presented a weirdly biased article. Also, just because a lot if people are in a venue, that does not mean they are spending money. If they were, The place wouldn't have been going out of business.

Metal is a niche market, they shot themselves doing that. Obviously the "Symphony's" and "Alyx's" aren't the usual clientele, but they should be if you want to make money.

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