Five Statements Guaranteed to Annoy Music Elitists

Vinyl kills the MP3 industry
acidpix
Some of my friends think I'm a music elitist. Totally untrue.

After 25 years in record stores, and a lifetime of being a music junkie, I know more about music than the average bear. I cannot deny that. But an elitist? No way. I'm not even a decent critic. I can ramble poetic for hours about music that I love, but I can't bring myself to dog the bad stuff (at least not in print).

As a matter of fact, true music elitists and critics look at me with disgust. Hang around a few more minutes and I'll prove it to you.

See also:
- Record Store Geek: Five Signs You Might Be a Music Junkie
- Parent Hood: Mom's Rock and Roll "Warning Book" Backfired.

Are Elitists Born or Made?

How do I know I'm not an elitist?

First, I know 8,000 of these people. All over the Valley. All over the country. Friends, acquaintances, colleagues, good customers and bad. Some of my favorite people in this whole world are total music snobs (the High Fidelity video above is just barely an exaggeration).

Second, I know me. I don't give a fuck what critics think. I'm listening to Foghat's Stone Blue as I write this sentence (great album, still holds up). I think the fact that the Steve Miller Band isn't in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is a crime.

Anyway, I've spent my entire life using these two pieces of knowledge to help me participate in one of my favorite pastimes, annoying and arguing with music elitists.

It's not tough. We're talking about some serious geeks here. Obsessive, passionate, opinionated bastards who will get all worked up at a moment's notice. Pushing their buttons isn't that hard.

But it sure is fun.

Want me to show you how it's done?

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20 comments
CDHipster
CDHipster

I definitely agree with the 1. Vinyl statement.  People that listen today to vinyl have never put a quarter on a tone arm, heard a long bang when the needle drops on a record, or heard the hisses and pops.  I was one of the last CD converts.  I'd probably still be listening to records if they didn't stop making them in the 90s.  Now everything is digitally recorded.  It sounds just as good on a CD as on a record if it's recorded that way.  Yes, records have a better bass sound, but the treble sounds worse.  CDs played through a decent stereo sound great.  I think the only reason records are becoming popular are like I said, the people that play them now weren't even around back then, and also the record stores make a tremendous profit on records.

pdastein
pdastein

The only over 45 album I can make a case for is Ragged Glory (which just barely makes the cut).  With you on most of the rest of it, thigh.

Fiddlejo
Fiddlejo

My favorite thing about music snobs (or hipsters in general) is their use of the phrase 'over rated". Not that there are not bands with too much critical praise heaped on them, but because what they really saying is that the band you really like is not nearly as good as you think they are, which is really just hipster code for casting dispersions and belittlement upon you. So what I am saying is don't let them get away with insulting you without at least insulting them back. Dang hipsters.

GioDuarte
GioDuarte

This article definitely hits the nail on the head in many respects. For example I like how you approached Nirvana, while yes they are very overrated, and Nevermind was really their only claim to fame, you didn't gun for people with the "You like Nirvana, you should feel bad.." accusation that I hear all too often.

I for one do like Nirvana, and much of it I realize draws from nostalgia and memories of being young and the excitement and thrill of finding new music. 

Anywho, great write up, good read.

Kevin Phillips
Kevin Phillips

Most of it is pretty easy to agree with, and I wouldn't even say its that controversial. I'll agree that Nevermind is way overrated, but your Pearl Jam love just ruined any credit I was going to give you.

Jeremy Paul
Jeremy Paul

Why does ur link take me to an app dL??

Adam Cassidy
Adam Cassidy

Ha ! Dude is talking about music snobbery, but the bands he talks about are among the most famous top 40 groups ever. I guess that part would annoy music snobs...

Marco Cruz
Marco Cruz

Whenever you think that you know what good music is or have the influence to tell people what you believe is good music, youre wrong.

Jason Murphy
Jason Murphy

IF an album's master is reel to reel it sounds WAAAY better on vinyl .

Jason Murphy
Jason Murphy

vinyl is king IF the master was done on analog .

Gerald Schoenherr
Gerald Schoenherr

I thought that I was the only one that felt that way about Nirvana. But, than again I'm an elitist.

Michael O'Hara
Michael O'Hara

If you have a good or better stereo and set it up correctly records sound really nice in a way CDs can't. But it will go back audiophile only thing soon enough. But it's pretty hard to bitch about all the great reissues out now, even if they are kinda expensive

Justin J. Stewart
Justin J. Stewart

Saying CDs sound better than vinyl is foolish...sure CDs are easier to transport, but man, CD's scratch so easy, and once a CD scratches it's done...a record scratches, it skips for a second

JohnQ.Public
JohnQ.Public

Agree with everything that you said except Wrecking Ball was fucking amazing and was a terrific rock album.

valleynative
valleynative topcommenter

I knew coming into this article that I was pretty far from being a music elitist, but I found it to be an enjoyable read.

I was tempted to claim to be a fan of anything with vocals by chipmunks, hamsters or dogs,but couldn't quite carry through.

kcatbat
kcatbat

Seriously, dude, we should get together, burn a few and discuss this.

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