Ask Magic: My Girl's Hung Up On Her Ex; Should I End It?
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First of all, thanks for following me on Twitter, it means a lot. Okay: What should I do if I like one of my exes, even though we've been on and off a lot, and he's always talking to lots of other girls and lying?
We break up and then he always ends up texting me and telling me how much he loves me, and how I'm his first love, and how he misses me. What should I do? After he tells me all these things he always ends up talking and flirting with other girls. Help me, Magic!
Over and Over in Omaha
Dear Over and Over,
There's a saying that goes, "People will only get away with what you allow them to." That's exactly what came to mind when I read your question.
Of course there are always exceptions, and that's is why we must offer a few scenarios. You say that he always returns to talking and flirting with other girls.
Sometimes people say that if you keep your man well-fed he won't go looking for crumbs elsewhere, so if you really want to tame his hunger don't be afraid to really take control of your man--what I'm saying is that guys, for the most part, are pretty simple creatures, and if you can keep them satisfied that's the first step toward the perfect relationship.
When a relationship is new there's always frequent texting, silly notes, and naughty little things that keep it exciting. After a while, some of those things might slow down. At that point, some people start looking for that same excitement outside the relationship.
If you're serious about keeping your man, I suggest you keep the excitement turned way up! Otherwise your on-and-off thing may become a routine that never ends, and he'll only come back to you because he knows how to get his way when he's in need of some affection.
My girl dated this other guy for a year-and-a-half. He treated her like shit, and he abused her, but she still loves him. I treat her way better than he did. But she still cries about him, says she's confused. I don't want to deal with this shit.
What do I do, keep trying to treat her right, or just let her go and find a better girl?
Next Guy in Missouri
Dear Next Guy,
Your situation is a lot more common than you might think.