Here's How Not to Approach a Journalist on Facebook

Categories: Beef

spence.jpg
Facebook.com/spencetheband
Dear Spence,

When your singer, who goes by the name of Daniel David Spence on Facebook, first approached me on Facebook to become my "friend," I strongly considered accepting his request to friend me. After all, I work in digital marketing as a social media strategist, and I accept everyone who requests me -- the first time, at least. And, I mean, look at that profile picture -- it's almost like Pete Wentz reincarnated, and at the time you first requested me, Fall Out Boy was defunct.

I was missing the black hair dyed and flat-ironed look.

But, alas, I received two eerily similar Facebook messages from him in a row. This didn't seem like a genuine request for my precious friendship -- I smelled something that reeked of processed meat.

Screen Shot 2013-03-08 at 3.44.57 PM.png
This wasn't a Facebook friendship made in heaven. I decided not to respond at all, since it seemed like Daniel David Spence was just adding me to spew band updates -- not because he really wanted to be my friend. :-(

But then, OMG, on March 1 this year, I got another message from Daniel David Spence! Did this mean he actually wanted to be my true, genuine Facebook friend this time?!

It pains me -- saddens me to no end -- that, no, he didn't:

Thumbnail image for Screen Shot 2013-03-08 at 3.48.49 PM.png
By this point, I just had to respond. I mean, this Daniel David Spence was really vying for my friendship.

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70 comments
Suffolk7
Suffolk7

and you are an uptight twat. fuck Arizona and breaking bad.

G Paul Hudak
G Paul Hudak

Awww all of those girls look like boys :-)

Kyle Hague
Kyle Hague

maybe the article should be titled "how to fool a 'journalist' into giving you free publicity".

Brad Wayne
Brad Wayne

this has to be some of the corniest shit ever put to print. NEW TIMES, hey might as well put some of that sales staff on journalist duty, or have you already? haha

Beau McGranahan
Beau McGranahan

They probably do suck if they are doing this kind of thing. Spending too much time trying to be a rock star and not enough time focusing on your craft=shit music.

Joe Rollins
Joe Rollins

What a douche. When bands have to beg for attention, it's always because they aren't any good.

Timothy D Little
Timothy D Little

twat, twat, twatty,... twat twat. there. it lost it's power. poor little reporter.

Tony Morales
Tony Morales

Kudos for getting a piece done without need to drag it across 19 pages (wait, it wasn't a "Top 5/10/20" piece...) but is there so little to write about that its necessary to rehash articles that weren't good when they were originally written?

Dillon Costilla
Dillon Costilla

The best article in New Times this year!Stick to the only thing you're still good at, telling us what bands are touring.

David Hill
David Hill

I'm not sure what's more hilarious, Phoenix new times going down the shit hole, or Nicki for writing such a shitty article based on her personal drama.

Brad Bielesch
Brad Bielesch

Knocking the dust off of an old article about internet beef with a band no one's ever heard of? Boredom. Boredom everywhere.

OmahaMusicFan
OmahaMusicFan

OMG! I just got the exact same request from him and didn't know him or his band so I decided to Google him -- came across your article and you saved the day.

Can't believe he reacted the way he did. Thanks for helping save me the headache of having to deal with his sorry butt!!

ExplorTravMag
ExplorTravMag

Sorry to come so late to the party, Nicki, but I feel your pain.

I get so many requests (from travel writers) I simply can't accept them all!  I have the added benefit they all want to pitch me via Facebook and that's just now how we roll, either.

I've gotten so many responses to my, "Thanks, but no thanks" that were on par with this one, I finally had to quit responding at all, and simply hitting "Ignore".

If only these rock stars would understand they're not the only "rock stars" out there, ya know?

MarthaAllen
MarthaAllen

Two quick comments from someone who has worked with a lot of bands that appear, in many ways, to be "like" Spence in this marketing outreach (or "spamming" if you will) respect.  

One, it's entirely possible that "Spence" is nothing but great guys and they're an awesome band.  I'm not yet familiar with them, but attention all bands out there, beware how you interact with the press or this may be how kids like me hear of you.  The reaction above isn't all bad but please you just don't call a woman an "uptight twat" for reasons I needn't elaborate beyond this calling-out.  Take out that comment and the rest might be an example of bad PR but it's the gendered "uptight" reference that makes the exchange worthy of publication.  Ok?  Awesome. 

Two, I look forward to listening to "Spence" sometime, especially if what I'm listening to includes an apology for the "uptight" reference. :)  ---Martha Allen

wtf....
wtf....

WOW so Nicki decided to use her "Journalist" power to get back at someone over some stupid facebook comments???.... GROW THE FUCK UP!

WTF is Happening to NT....

jordobordo
jordobordo

Hi Nicki, I actually used to be in this band.  In fact I'm the guy still featured in the picture on the far left.  I just have to say I have no stake in this band at all, but I find that conversation really hard to believe.  I know dan really well and although he will respond like that to people who really are hard core assholes, i've never seen him just go off on someone for essentially no reason.  This makes me think this is one of two situations. number 1 is that you deleted alot of the thread and there are other messages from you that prompted him to get pissed and block you.  number 2 would be that he was confused at who you were and thought you were some other jerk (he does alot of promoting online and answers alot of messages so it is easy to get confused, i know i used to do it!)  so even though im not in Spence anymore, i'll just apologize to you on behalf of dan and everyone.  I really cant imagine it being more then a misunderstanding.  He's not that big of a dick haha.  but if that is the way it shook out then so be it!  (i added you on facebook by the way but couldnt send you a message)

asugirl8884
asugirl8884

First of all, this was supposed to be somewhat funny and a commentary on the ridiculous amounts of spam we all get, which can be extremely irritating especially if you're a journalist.

Second point: Nicki is the nicest, most caring person you'll ever meet. She is also a great journalist. She follows up with people and isn't afraid to ask tough questions. In this case, it was meant to be a joke. Mr. Spence didn't take it so well, and seems to have an extremely large ego and an inability to deal with women who question him. Sounds like he has mommy/girlfriend issues. He needs to learn how to communicate and respect people or he won't go very far in this world.

Whatever the case may be, Nicki doesn't deserve the flack for this. Mr. Spence does. He is rude, immature and clearly needs to grow up. I think the last time I heard the word "twat" use was when I was in eighth grade. Learn how to properly promote your band. Learn how to TALK to other people, especially women, with respect and dignity, instead of like a 12-year-old boy with no social skills. Mr. Spence deserves all the negative feedback he is getting, and it's unfortunate he has to go online and force his friends to defend him. 

As an aside: The most irritating part is the spam is designed to look casual, like he just typed it up. I hate this kind of deception.


reality
reality

Wow you Americans just make everything a goddamn drama don't you?

eovogt
eovogt

I cant believe you make a living doing this.

selough
selough

I think it's time to call the Facebook police.

eremitic
eremitic

Wow, love how people are defending this guy for spamming (which is against Facebook policy) and being a manipulative douche.  There are a million better ways to meet connects that don't involve strangers mass spamming and subsequently attacking the person they originally wanted to be friends with on Facebook all because they couldn't use her for what they wanted. Getting them blacklisted may have been a tad overboard but whatever.  Entitled attitudes like that make me think they just spam for plays anyway and puts the entire band in a negative light.  Music isn't even that good, either.  Basically, there's a professional way to go about this sort of thing and nothing this guy did was even remotely close to that.

hotchman1
hotchman1

I wonder how many of the comments here are from fans of this band. Nikki is a good person and not a Twat. Especially not after a 5 min facebook conversation. What a little idiot this guy is.

JustForThis
JustForThis

Commenters need to realize that when contacting a promoter or journalist to plug your music/band, sending multiple copy paste messages clearly hinting that you expect some exposure or name passing in return is not only rude, but incredibly unprofessional. Then to follow a simple request to state your business with more bullshit and insults? It boggles the mind...

Good on you Nicki, if this guy wants fame and recognition he can earn it the hard (real) way...

Popater
Popater

What a cunt Nicki is ey. A few words on Facebook and you end this guys and his friends ambitions. Ha that's journalism for you right?

samom7
samom7

Writer is an uptight twat, she needs to smoke a blunt and chill da fuuuuuuuuck ouuuuuut. #420blazeitfaggot

alexandra.lynch
alexandra.lynch

@wtf.... It's the first thing I've read by New Times in a long while. Too much of this wouldn't be attractive though but she blasted the fool red handed!

bubbaphatbootyhunta
bubbaphatbootyhunta

@asugirl8884 Love the fact that you automatically assume that this guy has an "inability to deal with women who question him".  WAY TO PLAY THE GENDER CARD!  Did it ever occur to you that this might have been a misunderstanding, and the fact that nicool16 has a vagina didn't even enter into it?

Good to see that sexism is still a 2-way street!

hadouken
hadouken

@reality Im an american and I think this is absurd. Can't believe this garbage gets posted.

selough
selough

@JustForThis right? These comments saying the writer is the one to blame are saddening. Why would you ever insult someone that you are trying to get to write good things about you? PR and marketing aside, that's just against all common sense. Clearly he knew Nicki's reach by contacting her in the first place. Spamming (yes, c/p and name dropping is spamming) a journalist is going to get you nowhere but the black list.

DumTwat
DumTwat

@samom7  You need to stop putting strangers dicks in your mouth, that speech impediment you have got there is quite nasty.

MadInAmerica
MadInAmerica

 @hadouken @reality I'm an American and this is an outrage. How can be people be SO DRAMATIC? I can't even believe it! All they do is get all worked up over nothing! For nothing! Well guess what? I'm done with it. I am going to get everybody on the 86 list of everything everywhere forever.

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