If Video Game Characters Became Rock Stars...

Categories: Lists, Video Games
brutal legend.jpg
Brütal Legend, a 2009 video game released by Electronic Arts, featured voice work by Jack Black, Lemmy Kilmister, Rob Halford, Ozzy Osbourne and Lita Ford and a soundtrack of more than 100 hard rock and metal songs.

Over the past three decades, two institutions have constantly remained near-universal pastimes of the young and young-at-heart: Rock 'n' roll music and video games. Despite myriad changes in the sound, style, technology and sophistication of both mediums, video games and rock music have endured as uniting forces in an ever-evolving youth culture that places increasing importance on individuality.

It's no surprise, then, that the two have also been intertwined since video games first rose to prominence in the early '80s. Long before games like Guitar Hero and Rock Band turned gamers into "rock stars" with instrument-shaped controllers, there was the infamously shitty Journey arcade game, in which you played as all five band members, trying to retrieve their respective instruments in time for an outer space gig.

The relationship seems to be a little one-sided, however. Rock stars showing up in video games is relatively commonplace, but when was the last time you saw a two-dimensional, pixelated video game hero playing in a real live rock band? With that in mind, let's take a look at some of the most popular video game characters over the years and speculate on what direction their musical careers might have taken, had things gone differently.

Simon Manowar.jpg
Simon Belmont (Castlevania) as a Random Member of Manowar:
To be honest, when I first started formulating this list, I had Simon pegged as more of a goth band kind of guy. After all, the guy spends most of his time in dimly lit castles, searching for vampires and other nefarious creatures of the night. Then I did a Google image search for him, and I realized that I was so very, very wrong. Simon Belmont clearly would have been a member of Manowar. The boots are perfect, but he might have to lose the shirt. Speaking of which...

little mac marky mark.jpg
Little Mac (Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!) as Marky Mark:
If Little Mac, the diminutive hero of the Punch-Out!! series, had chosen a career in music, he obviously would've been rapper-turned-underwear-model-turned-actor Marky Mark Wahlberg. What they both lack in height, they make up for in athleticism, gritty determination and a propensity for fighting. The fact that Wahlberg recently starred in The Fighter just solidifies it. These two are cut from the same cloth.

Mega Man Ran.jpg
MegaMan as MegaRan:
This one is just so obvious. I mean, how can you not picture MegaMan as a video game-obsessed indie rapper who also happens to be a middle school teacher? The resemblance is uncanny...  

Cloud Billy Idol.jpg
Cloud Strife (Final Fantasy VII) as Billy Idol:
I've never actually played any of the Final Fantasy games, so I have no idea what Cloud's personality is like, however, I do know that Billy Idol is the only person, rock stars and regular Joes alike, who has actually pulled off that hairstyle in real life.

CJ-50.jpg
Carl "CJ" Johnson (Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas) as 50 Cent:
Okay, so Fiddy is from New York and CJ is from a fictionalized version of the West Coast. That's about the only thing these two don't have in common. Both came from hardscrabble backgrounds, fell into criminal activity at a young age and eventually rose to the top of their respective careers. Plus, they both seem to get shot at an awful lot...

Samus Grace.jpg
Samus Aran (Metroid) as Grace Perry (Landmine Marathon):
Gamers old enough to remember the original Metroid for the Nintendo Entertainment System will fondly recall that initial "What the fuck?" moment when, in the game's closing scenes, the badass, metallic main character, Samus Aran, is revealed to be -- SPOILER ALERT! -- a smokin' hot chick. First-time listeners could easily have the same reaction when they find out that the vocalist behind Landmine Marathon's metallic grunting, growling and screaming is actually -- you guessed it -- a smokin' hot chick.

Link Boys Like Girls.jpg
Link (The Legend of Zelda) as the Blond Dude in Boys Like Girls:
Link doesn't talk much, so it's hard to get a read on his personality, but he's definitely got the right hair for an emo band. Since he spends the majority of his time trying to rescue the oft-kidnapped Princess Zelda, Boys Like Girls seemed to be an appropriate band for him.

Pacman Kinison.jpg
Pac-Man as Sam Kinison:
Okay, so Kinison is best known as a comedian, but he did record an awesome cover of "Wild Thing," the video for which featured the always lovely Jessica Hahn. When it comes to big-mouthed '80s icons with an insatiable appetite for white lines, Pac-Man and Kinison reign supreme, so it would make sense that the former's career would mirror the latter's, had Pac-Man decided to take up music and/or stand-up comedy.

Black Ops Bieber.jpg
Random Multiplayer Character (Call of Duty: Black Ops) as Justin Bieber:
Granted, there's no physical resemblance between these two, and a nameless grunt battling it out on the front lines doesn't really have anything in common with a teenage pop sensation. It's just that whenever I'm playing Domination and my team is getting spawn-raped by a bunch of noobtube-toting bitches, this is the little douchebag I imagine on the other end. You know the one - he's the shithead with the "xXx" at the beginning and end of his username and a crudely constructed penis or swastika (or some combination of both) as his playercard emblem. On the other hand, that makes it all the more satisfying when I pull out my crossbow and plant an explosive-tipped arrow right in his chest. Turn that hat around, punk...
Follow us on Twitter and friend us on Facebook

My Voice Nation Help
7 comments
linkiss
linkiss

Our online shop, soozone.com ,sells all brands of products, such as Versace,Oakley,Lacoste, Armani , Diesel and so on. We sincerely provide various cheap and high quality products in online shops. Welcome to and have a look! Specially, this season We introduced many high quality Versace boot and cheap Oakley sunglasses. Versace boot has Various sample color and various styles, you bound to select a pair your favorite boot. If you buy more, the price would be even cheaper. Attention everybody! There are many cheap sunglasses, especially Oakley sunglasses. Oakley sunglasses is not only style vogue, but also the colour diversity. The most important is cheap. Come on! Don’t miss!

linkiss
linkiss

Our online shop, soozone.com ,sells all brands of products, such as Versace,Oakley,Lacoste, Armani , Diesel and so on. We sincerely provide various cheap and high quality products in online shops. Welcome to and have a look! Specially, this season We introduced many high quality Versace boot and cheap Oakley sunglasses. Versace boot has Various sample color and various styles, you bound to select a pair your favorite boot. If you buy more, the price would be even cheaper. Attention everybody! There are many cheap sunglasses, especially Oakley sunglasses. Oakley sunglasses is not only style vogue, but also the colour diversity. The most important is cheap. Come on! Don’t miss!

linkiss
linkiss

Versace is a name with resonance in the fashion industry due to the amazingly style and high quality. Shop the latest Versace boots handpicked by a global community of independent trendsetters and stylists. Offer cheap replica Versace women’s boots and sell at a discount. The Versace boot is on sale now. Take a look at these crazy Versace Cut-Out Platform Boots! You can't stop looking at them! No matter what age, what the weather is outside, it is important that everyone should wears some kind of eye protection. Our shop offers Cheap Sunglasses, a wide range of sunglasses and goggles. You can from soozone.com website choose your favorite cheap Sunglasses. Now what really knocked me out are the cheap sunglasses.Oakley store online news and Oakley store online reviews help you know more detailed information about Oakley store online. Our Oakley Sunglasses online shop is your best choice!Many fashion & top quality replica Oakley sunglasses are cheap sale for men & women online. It is a wiser approach for online purchasing Oakley sunglasses because you are able to clearly compare the appearance and preciseness of the replica. Buy Oakley Sunglasses online with confidence.

linkiss
linkiss

Dear customers, thank you for your support of our company.Here, there's good news to tell you: The company recentlylaunched a number of new fashion items! ! Fashionableand welcome everyone to come buy. If necessary,welcome to :===== www. soozone.com========

linkiss
linkiss

Our online shop, soozone.com ,sells all brands of products, such as Versace,Oakley,Lacoste, Armani , Diesel and so on. We sincerely provide various cheap and high quality products in online shops. Welcome to and have a look! Specially, this season We introduced many high quality Versace boot and cheap Oakley sunglasses. Versace boot has Various sample color and various styles, you bound to select a pair your favorite boot. If you buy more, the price would be even cheaper. Attention everybody! There are many cheap sunglasses, especially Oakley sunglasses. Oakley sunglasses is not only style vogue, but also the colour diversity. The most important is cheap. Come on! Don’t miss!

linkiss
linkiss

Dear customers, thank you for your support of our company.Here, there's good news to tell you: The company recentlylaunched a number of new fashion items! ! Fashionableand welcome everyone to come buy. If necessary,welcome to :===== www. soozone.com========

Xander
Xander

I thought I was going to nerd rage hard on this article, BUT I FOR ONE AM PLEASED WITH THE RESULTS.

Now Trending

Phoenix Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

Clubs

Loading...