Band: The Brazen Heads
Title: Curse of the Hag
Basics: Sometimes in life, we get a raw deal -- a particular instance or chain of events that presents us with an obstacle we must overcome. Perhaps it's the passing of a close relative or the disintegration of a marriage or relationship. Whatever the case may be, one's private life may become clouded with barriers that -- while of great importance -- must be dealt within one's normal daily routine.
That is, a marriage might be on the rocks, but we must still go to work and pretend that everything is okay, trying as we might to shelter what is really going on in our lives. Grandma may have just passed, but we have to be there for our children and provide them with the necessary strength to get by.
Listening to this record The Brazen Heads' Curse of the Hag is like dealing with the death of a loved one.
Best Song: I honestly do not think something deserving of the word "best" exists on this album. I compared this record to the death of a loved one because the band recorded an entire album -- 50 long, long minutes -- yet I have to listen to it and pretend there is something, anything redeeming about it -- there just isn't. I can say anything I can think of to cheer up little Bobby and Susie, but we all know Grandma Agnes isn't going to make it to Thanksgiving this year.
Worst Song: Sure, they say it's easier to be negative about something than it is to give something praise. I think that's bullshit. A favorite band is instantly likable because there already exists a positive disposition towards the band and their music. When a new album comes out from said band, it is often very simple to say plenty of nice things about the music -- it is an inclination impossible to ignore. When that same, favorite band produces something believed to be sub-par, it is more difficult to realize what is being listened to is not up to the band's standards for quality. If something's good right away, we like it instantly. If something is not quite as brilliant, it takes time to label it as such.
That being said, "Sweet Whiskey" makes the Pampers "Potty Dance" dude
seem like Glenn Danzig. It is a boring, formulaic song that sounds like it was recorded by a tribute band to a tribute band of Flogging Molly, which isn't very fair to Flogging Molly. You know you're in for it when there is a flute within the first 10 seconds of the song. If you want it to feel like you're celebrating St. Patrick's Day at the intensive care unit, then please, by all means, put on Curse of the Hag
Suggestions: Rename the album, Go Fuck Yourself, because that's what it felt like to listen to this garbage. The effort on the album is debatable (there are 14, fourteen songs), but the music is just so bland and so uninspired, it felt rude for them to ask me to take the time to listen to it. We're a proud people, Americans, never wanting to admit when we are wrong or when we've presented something perceived by many as below average, but this album is just so bad that it felt like the band themselves were just fucking with me the whole time. "How can we make it so he has to waste nearly an hour of his life listening to our music while teetering on the brink of insanity? Let's submit our album to You Asked For It!"
Honestly, I need to do a better job screening albums before I decide to review them. You can send in all the crap you want, but if there is a clear lack of effort and ingenuity, then it is not being reviewed with more than a sentence. Don't waste my time and I sure as shit won't waste yours.
Grade: Take a wild guess.
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