Phoenix Music Blog

When I blogged about the costuming blunders at the opening weekend of the Arizona Renaissance Festival last week, you were probably wondering where all the hot wenches were. Because, as we all know, that's the real reason why so many guys flock to the ren faire. Not for the turkey legs or the jousting or the kickass swords and maces and stuff. For the boobs!!

Her face? As if you really care...

Can't say I blame you... a fine wench "shelf" is a thing of beauty indeed. When I worked front gate at the faire a few years back, we took great pride in our cleavage. The Arizona faire is family-friendly, but that's no reason to deprive adults and horny teenage boys of their eye candy, right? Unfortunately one day I tried the truly authentic (read: no bra) look, and in the chilly morning air my poor nipples saluted like military school cadets. My boss covered me with his cloak and relieved me of duty. Needless to say, I'm pretty sure it wasn't the dads who complained.

 

Flaming red hair + gorgeous body + chain maille bra = every geek's dream girl

That family-friendly vibe seems to have taken over, as the supply of wenches was limited this year. But we found a few fair maidens whose voluptuous curves stood out. Peep some more magnificent mammaries (and other fine feminine parts) after the jump! 

Photo by Noelle Song

Grrrrowl! We're guessing this one's a bit of a cougar. But between the pirate hat, sizable assets and off-the-shoulder action, more than a few patrons were looking to plunder her booty.  

 

Dramatic. Exotic. Beautiful. And, like all belly dancers, able to move her body in ways you never dreamed of.

 

This fresh and lovely wench could be jailbait. So we'll say nothing about her stunning balcony, nor the fact she's stationed at the Dragon Tail "Giant Slide." Wink, wink.

 

Gives new meaning to "helping hands!" Now if Victoria's Secret could only learn to lift and separate that well...

 

Photo by Noelle Song

And one more set, just for good measure. Makes you thirsty, doesn't it?? (The drink, of course.)