5 Things Men Secretly Love About Women

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Courting Disaster is Jackalope Ranch's weekly column of dating horror stories, observations, how-tos, and more by Katie Johnson. Names of ex-boyfriends, past hookups, and bad blind dates have been changed to protect the guilty.

Few of us can claim to be fluent in the language of love. In truth, there's a lot that gets lost in translation. But between worrying about what to wear and what to say, it may help to know there are several things you're probably already doing that he secretly loves.

See also: 5 Things Women Secretly Love About Men

5. Your body

Okay, maybe men wanting to see you naked isn't so much a secret. But the fact that they couldn't care less about a pimple, an ingrown, a couple extra pounds, or the fact that you haven't shaved your legs in a day or two is. If it comes down to touching up your toe nail polish or making it to the date on time, we vote you skip the speedy pedicure and choose the latter. After all, it's the devil that's in the details, not your boyfriend.



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34 comments
Maggie Romero
Maggie Romero

Carole needs to do herself (and everybody else) a favor and just leave. Take your vemon elsewhere.

Doris Freeman
Doris Freeman

If this list is correct, then men are seriously flawed. Article is stupid.

Rodney Alling
Rodney Alling

Five things men and women secretly (or openly) love about the new times: And there you have it. What a ridiculous article (again)

Bill Wanick
Bill Wanick

5 secrets? Those aren't secrets.. you should be ashame for taking the time to list this stuff. Pull it together new times.

Victoria King
Victoria King

What a stupid waste of air! I can't imagine why this would ever be published so dumb! \U0001f620

Samuel Scott
Samuel Scott

I love them for bringing me into this world (:

Carole Kennelly
Carole Kennelly

Wow. Minimalistic and insulting. Yep, sounds like Phoenix.

Peg Wolfe
Peg Wolfe

*SIGH* Oh, New Times. . . you used to be so worth reading back in the day. . .

UseYourSpellcheck
UseYourSpellcheck

Wow, made it all the way to page 2 without any of the lazy spelling mistakes and poor grammar/punctuation!

Egregious_Philbin
Egregious_Philbin

The weekly inane column from Katie.  Gotta fill space with something, I guess.

rosignup
rosignup

An ingrown what? An ingrown hair, or an ingrown toenail? Ingrown is an adjective, not a noun. You're a journalist. Learn to write.

YourMom
YourMom

Dear previous commenters, I beg of you, continue living in your miserable existence elsewhere.  BYE.

marcy
marcy

Most men secretly love sticking their penis in a woman.  Oh wait, it's not that big a secret except to Katie.


But Katie is right that it is a secret that men like a women who can pound down the chow like an NFL linebacker.  It's such a secret I haven't met a man yet who realized it.


But I get it, Katie likes to pound down the food, gets embarrassed (probably the excess gravy dribbling down the double chin), has a lot of pimples, ingrown nails, a few extra pounds (code for well into shopping the plus size shops), works a room (code for gets drunk at parties and doesn't realize it), drives a stick because she couldn't afford an automatic or power windows and hasn't figured out what men really want because she has a smelly jungle down there.



US_War_Veteran
US_War_Veteran

Katie Johnson, you have NO IDEA of what you are talking about, you are WRONG on ALL accounts and this article is pure BS, with #5 (your body) you're only half right, while we don't care about a pimple, a few extra pounds, or your toe nail polish, for Christ's sake shave your legs and take care of that ingrown, REAL men want to date/marry a woman, not a guy in female form.

US_War_Veteran
US_War_Veteran

Katie Johnson, you have NO IDEA of what you are talking about, you are WRONG on ALL accounts and this article is pure BS, REAL men want to date/marry a woman, not a guy in female form.

UraHack
UraHack

You have no grasp on the male gender.

Alltheanswers
Alltheanswers

@UseYourSpellcheck You are lazy. Wow! Your observation is boring and that means you were too lazy to try. Your imagination is asleep. Wake up!

UraHack
UraHack

@YourMom  I don't know what you're talking about, but I am doing great! KJ, on the other hand, has no clue what she's talking about and should be called out for doing so.

UraHack
UraHack

@marcy  Men secretly love a woman who doesn't think she knows everything.

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