5 Most Ridiculous Craigslist Missed Connections in Metro Phoenix in April

Categories: Technology

The following content has been labeled Most Ridiculous.
If you've felt down this month over a lack of lovin', you can take solace in the fact that you weren't missed by any of the Craigslist posters on this list. From odd locales and sticky situations to misguided attempts at attraction and basic English, we found the past month's best Missed Connections.

And by best, we mean worst.

See also: 50 Signs You're Dating a Basic Bitch

5. I can be the Pokey to your Gumby

Take. Acid. Now. This is either some really late Halloween leftover lusting or Hunter S. Thompson is back from the dead and ready to get busy with the Gumbys of the world. In true Stefon-à-la-Bill-Hader-style, this post has everything: two hot nurses, a "gentlemanly iguana lover," and a heatseeking missile . . . You know, that thing where a midget that's your boyfriend dresses up as a firefighter and cock-blocks you.

4. You thretened to arrest me if i didnt let u in

All bets are off when basic grammar is as callously disregarded as it is in this post. It goes on to reveal that the heartthrob officer in question has arrested her friend, and she found it fit to flirt with him on a domestic violence call -- all by the ripe young age of 22. Unfortunately for our little cop groupie, he'd need a warrant to forcibly gain access to her place.

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