Introducing the Boobypack: "A Top Shelf Fannypack"

Categories: Don't Wear That

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The Bobbypack by Christina Conrad
All too often, women ravers have been burdened with the task of monitoring their valuables. Amidst the fluorescent bikini top, matching little girls' tutu, and butterfly wings, the places for storing your personal items are few and far between.

Fortunately New York based partygoer, Christina Conrad, has created a solution -- and she's launched a Kickstarter to make it happen.

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The Boobypack is a neon sport bra that stores all the little essentials of electric dance enthusiasts. There's a side pocket under each arm pit to store keys, ID, small traces of narcotics, and of course, your cell phone. Because there's really no safer place for your radiation-emitting cell phone then nestled securely against your breasts and lymph nodes.

boobypack3.jpg
The Bobbypack by Christina Conrad
So what does Christina Conrad need to produce the Boobypack, a revolutionary pocket bra that will give you the freedom to jump, thrash, mosh, and shimmy to your heart's content?

Well, for a measly $15K, Conrad will produce 1,000 Boobypacks and a barebones website. Bump it up to $30K and she'll deliver 2,000 Boobypacks plus a gallery for lady ravers to upload photos of themselves wearing this cargo pant equivalent of lingerie.

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The Bobbypack by Christina Conrad
Take it all the way to $60K and not only will she be able to manufacture 4,000 Boobypacks but she'll also begin development on a new line of rack packs that actually charge your electronics while you wear them.

And again, while we hate to throw out the 'C' word, we just have to ask: Isn't this just asking for cancer?

Don't worry, Conrad addresses that little issue: according to National Cancer Advisory, "Although there have been some concerns that radiofrequency energy from cell phones held closely to the head may affect the brain and other tissues, to date there is no evidence from studies of cells, animals, or humans that radiofrequency energy can cause cancer." 

See. They can't prove it. Yet.

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