Courting Disaster is Jackalope Ranch's weekly column of dating horror stories, observations, how-tos, and more by Katie Johnson. Names of ex-boyfriends, past hookups, and bad blind dates have been changed to protect the guilty.
| Paramount Pictures|
|For the record, Audrey Hepburn is not a basic bitch. But basic bitches love her. |
By now you've probably heard about the basic bitch. (Oh you haven't? Better watch this Funny or Die PSA). The basic bitch is hardly something we women aspire to be -- though, in truth, we do cross into basic territory every once in a blue moon (case in point, drinking Blue Moon). But there are definitely some pros for any guy who wants to date one.
Pro: She's loyal, albeit bordering on needy.
Pro: She's malleable, like silly putty or tofu. If you're looking for a predictable sidekick to live out your cookie cutter existence with, the basic bitch is your girl.
Con: She's basic.
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