JK Grence

Welcome back to the Blended Summer drink series. I can only start out this week's column by saying... Oh, man, do I love this drink. It's one that I first discovered during my days behind the stick at Trader Vic's. I was always eager to show it off, even though it wasn't on our menu.

See Also:
How to Make the Best Rum Runner
How to Make Perfect Frozen Margaritas

Suffice to say, it's about as Tiki as a drink can get. Rum? Check. Tropical fruit? Check. Lurid, licentious name? Big check. But for some reason, it fell by the wayside while the Zombie and the Mai Tai shot to stardom. I'm talking about none other than the Missionary's Downfall.

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right, JK Grence

The spread at GaHyang in Glendale.

The countdown to Best of Phoenix is on. Mark your calendar: This year's issue will be on newsstands September 26. What better way to warm up than by asking some local "experts" to list their own personal bests? This week JK Grence, who pens Chow Bella's Last Call column, shares his five favorite spots to eat after midnight.

For practically as long as I can remember, I've been a creature of the night. I prefer to work evenings, stay up all night, and then jump into bed moments before daybreak brings its compelling case to stay awake. Whether I'm just getting done waiting tables or tending bar, or I've enjoyed a night of wild revelry, I often find myself in want of great food when I have zero desire to cook.

So, these are my five favorite places to go when the midnight oil has burned off. I feel a little bad that the list is mostly Central Phoenix and Scottsdale-oriented, but... well... you try finding a place open past 1 AM outside of Loop 101.

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JK Grence

This week for Last Call, my frozen drink series continues with arguably the most popular cocktail in the state. That's right, it's time to make some frozen margaritas. Sounds simple enough. I've already written an article about "regular" non-frozen margaritas; all I'd have to do is take one and toss it in a blender, right? Wrong, wrong, wrong.

See Also:
The Secret to the Perfect Margarita (Hint: It Does Not Include Agave Nectar)
How to Make the Best Rum Runner

Frozen drinks have challenges that you don't have to deal with when making drinks straight up or on the rocks. The main one is a matter of taste. There's a double whammy going on here. First, all of the ice you're consuming waters down the drink more than usual, so you have to use strong tasting ingredients. Second, the very cold temperature numbs your taste buds. A regular margarita that's been blended will taste like nothing.

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JK Grence

I've had it.

I'm sick of fellow bartenders who turn up their nose at frozen drinks. Most mixologists in town get a disgusted sneer at the mere mention of the word "blender". Countless bar blenders have found themselves victim to horrible "accidents" wrought by bartenders who find blended drinks beneath them. And let's not get started with the booze-loaded slushie machines like you find at Fat Tuesday. Yes, blenders are loud, and they're a pain in the ass to clean. But, ya know what? We live in Phoenix. It's freaking hot here, and nothing quells the sting of summer heat like an icy frozen drink. So, for the next month, rev up your blenders for enough frozen drinks to get you through summer.

We're starting out with a trip down to the Florida Keys. Specifically, we're going to the Holiday Isle Resort on Islamorada. Back in the 1970s, guests were welcome to pour their own cocktails from bottles left on the bar. (Boy, those were the days, huh?) Thanks to some odd ordering, the bar found itself with tons of three ingredients: Blackberry brandy, banana liqueur, and 151-proof rum.

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JK Grence

I love a good Moscow Mule. But then, who doesn't? It's more interesting than your average vodka drink (i.e., ridiculous flavored vodka and soda or 7-Up), but accessible enough for mainstream mass appeal.

See also:
- Stop the Reduced-Calorie Vodka Madness!
- How to Make a Great Moscow Mule
- Mojito Season Is Open

Though the Moscow Mule is refreshing and delicious, it is are, after a while, like a pop song repeating endlessly on the radio: It just sort of blends into itself until you barely notice what's happening. I find myself wanting a drink with a little something . . . extra. A dash or two of je ne sais quoi, if you will. That's where one of my heroes of modern bartending, Audrey Saunders, comes in.

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JK Grence

Just say no.

Part of writing this column, and of bartending, is keeping abreast of booze trends. One would have to live under a rock to not know that flavored vodka is massively popular. Take a look at almost any back bar in town, and there's a wide array of flavors from classic (vanilla, citron, orange) to creative (passion fruit, cucumber, huckleberry) to "Are you fucking kidding?!" (PB&J, glazed donuts, Swedish Fish). Who the hell comes up with these? Do they start focus groups by getting everyone stoned out of their minds?

See Also:
Tony Abou-Ganim & Adam Seger: On Vodka, Vermouth, and Cocktail Culture in Russia
How To Make a Great Moscow Mule

Pardon me, I'm getting a little tangential. This week, my booze screed covers what I believe to be one of the most insidious marketing ploys I've seen in a long time: Reduced calorie vodka. French brand Voli was the first on the scene a couple of years ago, but they barely made a splash. Now, spirits giants Diageo and Beam both have energized their marketing juggernauts.

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JK Grence

Here I go again with drinks with weird names. Hanky Panky? It manages to be hopelessly outdated, yet still carries a lurid aura with it. The origin of the drink's name is a bit more innocent. It goes back to the early 20th century, at the American Bar in London's Savoy Hotel.

See Also:
- Corpse Reviver: Bringing a Cocktail Back from the Dead

Ada "Coley" Coleman was a pioneer in bartending. She was one of the first well-known female bartenders in a profession that was long dominated by men. She later woulx hand the reins of the Savoy's American Bar to Harry Craddock, who would go on to write the Savoy Cocktail Book, still considered essential reading for anyone with a taste for classic cocktails.

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JK Grence

This weekend, brace your livers for impact. Sunday is Cinco de Drinko Mayo. Thankfully, I already have that base covered with how to make an awesome margarita. But first, it's time to get out your ludicrously oversized hats for the Kentucky Derby on Saturday. If it's time for the Derby, it's time for mint juleps.

See Also:
- 10 Favorite Summer Cocktail Tips from Chow Bella's Resident Bartender, JK Grence
- Five Fashionable (and Booze-Filled) Kentucky Derby Parties in Metro Phoenix

While reading up on mint juleps, I discovered two things: First, everyone is convinced that their method of making a mint julep is the best and only way to do it. Second, no two bartenders make theirs the same way. Naturally, I have my own way of doing things, mostly courtesy of Gary Regan and his excellent book The Joy of Mixology.

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JK Grence

The Sidecar

For more than a year now, Shady's bartender and regular Chow Bella contributor JK Grence, has been providing invaluable advice to the alcohol-infused masses with his "Last Call" column. Considering this grand milestone, we decided to take a look back at some of his best tips as we head into the summer.

Read on to see some of our favorite summer cocktail recipes and drinking advice, courtesy of Grence.

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Heather Hoch

I just took a look at the calendar, and realized that Cinco de Mayo is right around the corner. Never mind that it's barely a blip on the radar in Mexico; around here, it's become Cinco de Drinko, where it's socially acceptable to get wasted on crummy margaritas and horrible Mexican beer. If you're going to have some margaritas, you might as well make them right.

See Also:
- 3 Tips for Avoiding Beer Tragedies of the Mexican Variety
- 10 Best Margaritas in Metro Phoenix

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