Doritos Jacked and Doritos Flamas: Chow Bella Taste Test, Part 3
The Guilty Pleasure: Doritos Jacked and Flamas tortilla chips
Where To Get It: Your favorite grocery store.
Price: About $3
What It Really Costs: Red fingers from inhaling an entire bag of Flamas chips.
I'm finally at the bottom of the huge bags of chips I brought back from the grocery store. This week, I rip open the bags of Frito-Lay's attempt to make the Manliest Chips Ever, Doritos Jacked. According to the product literature, each chip is 40 percent bigger than a regular Doritos chip and thicker for extra crunch.
I'm not sure how super-sizing the chip automatically makes the chip more manly. I guess it works in the same way that a raised Ford F-250 is more manly than a Toyota Tacoma: If it makes you feel better, more power to you, but everyone else thinks you're overcompensatings for certain shortcomings. The big chips are kind of ridiculous. They're so big that you can't really fit them in your mouth, so you have to break them in half before you eat them. What's the point?
That said, I did enjoy the extra crunch brought by the thicker chip. I imagine the extra tensile strength will make these fantastic dipping chips. Alas, no guacamole was in sight during taste testing. If you try it, write in, and let me know how it goes, Okay?
JK Grence Left: Doritos Flamas, resplendent in Technicolor red. Right: Doritos Jacked Enchilada Supreme, looking as big and manly as a chip can look. Which is to say, not much.
I tried out two flavors: Spicy Chipotle BBQ, and Enchilada Supreme. First up were the BBQ. Barbecue-flavored chips are fairly common, but they're always barbecue potato chips. As far as barbecue chips go, the flavoring on these was just . . . weird. There was no sense of balance to them. They had a decent spice kick (although any smoke from the advertised chipotle was nonexistent), but then after that, it was almost candy-sweet, off-puttingly so. A scan of the ingredient list revealed the culprit: Sucralose. That's right, they're putting Splenda on these chips. I'll pass, thank you very much.