Beauty Lab 2010: Get That Food Off Your Plate and Put It On Your Face

Cookin' up good looks in nature's pharmacy.

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Is there a woman on this planet who doesn't understand? Yeah, me.
After my run-in with molecular gastronomy, The French, and their invasive metric system in FoodLab 2010, my kind-hearted editor thought I might need a little TLC (tequila-loaded cocktail) and a bit of pampering, Chow Bella-style. Enter The Beauty Cookbook, a first-ever recipe book in which whatever gets created in the kitchen, gets put on you instead of your plate.

Hmm. That sounds safe. More tequila, please.

The book's authors and beauty experts, Kym Douglas and Cindy Pearlman, claim they've cooked up inexpensive recipes, treatments, and tips for women who want to boost their self-confidence and look good from head to toe without spending hundreds of dollars at the Christian Dior counter of Needless Markup Neiman Marcus.

Ladies, I hate to break this to you, but you have no idea who you're dealing with.

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Thanks for the Easter dress, grandma - not.
Look under the definition of "tomboy" and you'll find a picture of my me wearing one of many doll-like dresses my grandma spent hours making, only to have me ruin it by jumping into our church's backyard pond, or ripping it to shreds as soon as the opportunity presented itself to don a pair of Toughskins and my coveted Jaws T-shirt.

My encounters with hair, skin care, and make-up have ranged from accidentally dying my hair orange before a school photo, being trapped in a tanning bed with a flesh fly, and applying make-up, KISS-style, to sing in a rock 'n' roll band.

Think you got a shot at this Kym and Cindy? Better get cookin'. See ya next week!

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