What's the latest from the Old Pueblo and the ongoing donnybrook between Isabel Garcia and those who've taken the Pima County Legal Defender to task for her hoisting the head of a Sheriff Joe piñata during an anti-Joe demo? Seems the idiot who made an issue of the non-issue in the first place, frat-boyish talk radio host Jon Justice of Tucson's 104.1 FM is now in some agua caliente himself over two YouTube videos he posted showing him caressing a life-sized Isabel Garcia piñata, telling his audience, "I want to take her home," while he pawed the piñata’s papier-mâché curves.

Justice obviously intended this latest stunt as humorous, saying he was going to make the Garcia piñata his show's mascot, and joking about how Garcia's form was really light because, "Chorizo's not that fattening." In other words, dumb, unfunny stuff that makes Dane Cook look like Bill Maher by comparison. Gotta wonder why so many people are still taking Justice's insincere gripes about Garcia seriously.

(BTW, Garcia didn't bash the Joe piñata, others did. Not that I would have blamed her if she'd beaten the crap out of that thing. You can read all about it in the current Bird column, which is up now.)

Heh, fooled ya, it's all for free, and more scintillating than a marathon of Murder She Wrote reruns. That is, everything up till Chairman Andy Kunasek announces that he's not wearing any pants under the Board of Supes' horseshoe-shaped dais, or that the Call to the Public has begun. The latter is more likely, and is sure to be chock-full of people p.o.'d at the Supes for their continued, slavish support of Sheriff Joe Arpaio. (Save for Supervisor Mary Rose Wilcox, his sole critic on the BOS.) Outside the squat, Supes building, there may be a replay of last month's demo, and if you're curious how that went down, here's a new Dennis Gilman YouTube video to lay it all out for ya.

BONUS VIDEO: Below is another Gilman video based on Joe's Mesa sweeps, and a bizarre, troublesome report of MCSO deputies holding guns on kids during a raid from one of the sweeps. I had not seen this footage. Chilling stuff. How these a-hole deputies sleep at night after pulling such stunts should be a puzzle to any civilized person.

Finally, I should address the reports from Monday's incident at the Macehualli Work Center, where an enraged driver pointed a gun at nativist Lynne Stevens because the guy was pissed that Stevens was photographing him after picking up and then bringing back a jornalero from the day labor center.

That old example of a loaded question, "So, when did you stop beating your wife?" seems weirdly applicable in Valley political circles these days. First, there’s the June 26 incident involving Democratic state Representative Mark DeSimone, wherein DeSimone was arrested for allegedly punching his wife in the face during a late-night family squabble. DeSimone has promised to resign his Legislative District 11 House seat because of the arrest.

More recently, Michelle Berman, the wife of Gilbert Mayor Steve Berman, told the East Valley Tribune in a July 15 article that she had endured years of physical and mental abuse from her husband. She reported the abuse to a Gilbert police counselor. The Gilbert police handed the allegations over to the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office, which is investigating. Berman's denied that he's ever been abusive toward his wife, and has claimed she has a substance abuse problem. The Arizona Republic has subsequently reported that Mayor Berman's past marriages have included allegations of physical abuse.

Will Mesa legislator Russell Pearce be next in the list of pols tarnished by domestic violence allegations? During a recent LD 18 Clean Elections debate with his state Senate primary rival, fellow Republican Kevin Gibbons, the uber conservative Pearce referred to "abuse in our homes" as a "black eye on our society." But while doing some research on Pearce, I ran across a petition for dissolution of marriage filed back in 1980 by Pearce's wife of over 30 years LuAnne. The document is unremarkable, save for one, damning line:

"Further, the husband, RUSSELL KEITH PEARCE, is possessed of a violent temper, and has from time to time hit and shoved the wife, the last time being on February 3 [1980], when he grabbed the wife by the throat and threw her down."

You can read the doc in its entirety, here. The passage above is on page four, and is highlighted.

Sure, the document is 28 years old, and the file was eventually closed by the court for lack of activity. (Pearce and his wife are still married.) But, as I've mentioned, the issue has been much in the news of late, and Pearce has always presented himself as a law-and-order type of guy. One of his constant refrains, and one that has earned him near deity status amongst nativists in Arizona and beyond, is that we need to "take the handcuffs off law enforcement" and let them enforce all of the laws on the books, particularly those regarding undocumented aliens.

Next Saturday afternoon should be a pretty rowdy one in Phoenix's tony Biltmore Fashion Park. Not only will Sheriff Joe be appearing at the Borders Books there to promote his latest work of fiction, the prevarication-friendly Joe's Law, wherein Joe claims he's being hunted by the Minutemen and the Mexican mafia, that he helped break the French Connection, that he once almost ticketed Elvis, yadda-yadda-yadda. In addition, Joe's presence will bolstered by the racist bike gang Riders U.S.A., the bike club arm of Rusty Childress' United for a Sovereign America, the most vicious anti-immigrant hate-group in the Valley.

As you can see from the flier above, U.S.A. is organizing a prejudice picnic for Saturday the 26th, nearby the state Capitol. Folks will have to pay the pay-triots $15 the day of the event to garner entry, a free lunch, the chance to converse with other knuckledraggers (snorts and grunts are preferred), and the opportunity to listen to the likes of Don "Goofy" Goldwater bloviate. So far, he's the only confirmed speaker. Don, nephew of the late, great Sen. Barry Goldwater, continues to prove that his apple fell far, faaar away from the family tree, most recently by heading up two anti-immigrant initiatives L.A.W. and S.O.L.E., both of which failed to obtain enough sigs to reach ballot-hood despite a year's effort. Wow! And people get to pay $15 so they can listen to this idiot attempt to spit out the marbles in his mouth? Be still my thumping heart!

Why is U.S.A. charging people to attend a rally? Are times really that tough, fellas? Or is this a fundraiser to cover Buffalo Rick Galeener's legal bills? As regular readers of this blog know, Buffalo is currently contesting a misdemeanor charge of public urination stemming from an incident in March where he allegedly took an al fresco whiz in front of a woman's home, nearby the Macehualli Work Center in north Phoenix. Whatever the money's for, Buffalo weenie is apparently organizing the event, which is to start off at Wesley Bolin Plaza, downtown in front of the Capitol, and from there, journey to a "special surprise" picnic area.

Following the picnic and all the fun to be had staring at a fire truck obtained for the wingding -- not to mention the countless "beaner" jokes these anti-brown clowns will undoubtedly be swapping -- this tatterdemalion brigade of bigots will then ride their motorbikes down to the swank Biltmore area, where they will descend on Sheriff Joe's book signing at the Borders Books in the Fashion Park there. If this doesn't sound like an episode from The Beverly Hillbillies, with ex-KIA peddler Rusty "Crusty" Childress playing the part of Jethro Bodine, I don't know what does.

The suit blasts Arpaio's goons, charging that they've violated the Fourth and Fourteenth Amendments to the U.S. Constitution, Title VI of the 1964 Civil Rights Act, the Arizona Constitution, and ICE's Memorandum of Agreement with the MCSO, under which Arpaio has federal authority to enforce immigration law with 160 specially trained deputies. Obviously, Arpaio has made few bones about the fact that his "crime suppression sweeps" are in reality all about rounding up undocumented brown people, while denying accusations that he's racially profiling. Now he will have to face a team of high-powered constitutional legal beagles and justify his unconstitutional activities before a federal judge.

Though the complaint seeks "declaratory and injunctive relief," eschewing financial reward, and though it could be a year or more, according to ACLU of Arizona Legal Director Dan Pochoda, before the suit nears trial or the court takes some action, the psychological impact is tremendous as the lawsuit's legal shepherds gather information under the discovery part of the case.

"In the discovery phase, [the MCSO] has to turn over information," explained Pochoda. "Hopefully, well be getting deep into records that have never been looked at before... Then there will be testimony taken under oath, pretrial depositions, asking questions under discovery, and possibly a trial."

Video of the Tucson protest of Arpaio, from Jon Justice's 1041TheTruth, showing a Sheriff Joe piñata being beaten and Isabel Garcia scooping up its head.

Like you need more proof that times are way-way-slow down in the "Old Pueblo," Tucson radio wing nut "Jon Justice" is hunting the head of local pro-immigrant firebrand Isabel Garcia after Garcia toted the decapitated noggin of a Sheriff Joe Arpaio piñata at an anti-Joe protest.

Seems Nickel Bag Joe was down in Tucson recently for yet another book signing for his prevarication-friendly work of fiction Joe's Law. You know, the one where he claims to have been behind the crippling of the French Connection drug ring, and where he maintains that the Mexican mafia, the Minutemen and immigrant rights activist Elias Bermudez are conspiring against his life. Anyway, Joe was at a Tucson Barnes and Noble to pimp the tome, and there was a lawful protest at the B&N that included scores of demonstrators, and featured, at one point, a Sheriff Joe piñata that two teens beat to a pulp.

Um, like, so what? After all, Phoenicians may recall, if they strain really hard, that the local activist group PUEBLO caught a little heck from the media on Cinco de Mayo, when their inaugural shindig included several Sheriff Joe piñatas that were creamed by party-goers until Joe's candied innards rained from the sky like stripper dollars. PUEBLO was pilloried for the day, unfairly from my point of view, but even Joe didn't make that big of a stink over the matter. He got his mug on the telly that eve, and it wasn't even a media event his highly-paid army of PR flacks had orchestrated. Christ, the old fart was practically giddy.

Less than 48 hours later, the PUEBLO piñatas were forgotten, like last month's celebrity meltdown. And why shouldn't they be? We're just talking about some papier-mâché dolls stuffed with Tootsie Rolls and affixed with Joe's dyspeptic mug. Plus, whacking political piñatas ain't nothing new, much less eyebrow-raising, unless you're a complete ass-backwards moron with the cultural I.Q. of a Lincoln Log. Down in Latin America, it’s practically de rigueur for a pol to get bopped in this fashion, but you don’t have to go so far afield. Just check out piñatas.com, where you can find piñatas to abuse of all political stripes – whether it’s Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, Dick Cheney or Fidel Castro.

But it seems some rubes in Arizona's Second City think Joe Arpaio should belong to a protected class. Meat-headed lip-flapper Jon Justice, who spews loony venom for Tucson news talk station 104.1 FM "The Truth" (yeah, right), has organized a campaign to get Isabel Garcia fired from her post as the Pima County Legal Defender, because she was present when the piñata-smacking went down, and afterward lifted up the severed toy head and carried it forth through the crowd of protesters. He also wants her disbarred, and because Garcia has long been a lightning rod for nativist hate groups, he’s motivated other drooling imbeciles to call Garcia’s boss at the county and complain.

Interestingly, Jon Just-An-Ass recently added a full-size Garcia piñata to his shtick, and fondled it for a YouTube video, thereby removing all doubt as to his status as a blithering idiot. I guess if we were to take seriously his claim that Garcia threatened Joe with violence by picking up the piñata head, we'd have to assume, by the same wack logic, that he was threatening Garcia with sexual assault by molesting her effigy?

So I return from my brief respite from the sad insanity of Maricopa County to see that mean ol' Sheriff Joe's still so scared of Mesa Police Chief George Gascon that our cowardly top constable won't even step foot in his city!

I mean, Joe makes a big stink about going back into Mesa after his disastrous June sweep of that burg, but he sets up his mobile command center in a county island between Tempe and Mesa? Why do that when there's a perfectly good substation in Mesa from which to coordinate this wannabe-tough-guy dragnet of restaurant workers, house cleaners, and construction laborers going to or from their jobs? After all, if you're gonna use 100 deputies and old posse farts to hunt down undocumented folk instead of real criminals, you might at least save a little scrilla by using the facilities you already have, instead of parking your paddy wagons out in BFE.

I guess you could argue that maybe the MCSO wanted to operate in secret, save for the fact that Joe told the press where he would be at 5 p.m. for his press conference where he kvetched like some old drag queen about all of his high-profile critics, "thanking" everyone from Mayor Phil Gordon to Governor Janet Napolitano for unmanning him. The bitter, bitchy sarcasm flowed so freely from Joe's haggard lips, I half-expected to see Arpaio in pantyhose when the camera pulled back for a long shot.

I'll be out of pocket for the next couple of days, and so will not be able to blog as normal. There will be some catching up to do Monday, on the new Cave Creek raid and the series on Joe in the East Valley Tribune. Interesting video the Trib has online. Joe looks like a geriatric gangster, and PR flack Lisa Allen [formerly Lisa Allen MacPherson], his past-her-prime gun moll. I haven't had a chance to watch it all or read it all, so I'll reserve judgment until I can.

I have a bit of nativist nuttiness for you in the meanwhile, a member of United for a Sovereign America and stalwart supporter of Sheriff Joe by the name of Brandy Baron. A regular at anti-immigrant protests around town, Baron is a masseuse by trade, a practitioner of the art of the sensual touch, and though she strictly states on her Web site Brandysmassage.com that she will not perform any act of a sexual nature, she does offer "tandem" massages with an equally adipose skin-buffer by the name of Taylor.

Brandy is available by appointment at A Touch of Heaven Massage, which she's informed me in the past that she owns. The trade name is registered with the Arizona Secretary of State under the name Frank Baron, but the "Whois" for TOH's Web site lists "Brandy Baron" as the contact person.

Interestingly, two of her fellow masseuses, Angie and Nicole, have elected to have their faces blurred out online. Don't know why these gals would be so shy. Especially since the business' Web site features a disclaimer, which says,

"Anything of a sexual nature regarding massage is illegal so please don't ask us to discuss it with you. Rest assured you will have a pleasurable as well as relaxing experience with us."

Barron writes on her blog that she's of Hispanic descent, and is also firmly against any illegal immigration. She's particularly bitchy about immigration from Mexico (Canadians are apparently a-OK), and she claims she wants all of the nation's immigration laws enforced. She frequently can be found demonstrating up at the Macehualli Work Center in north Phoenix as part of U.S.A.'s ongoing harassment of that day-laborer site.

Baron is intelligent enough, and though we disagree on many subjects, we agree on some others, such as the legalization of prostitution, which she advocates. Indeed, in a blog called "BBW Brandy's Blog," on the site escortblogs.com, Baron writes about the differences between street hookers and the higher end of the trade.

"I don't think that there is any more special service that can be offered to another person than pleasure," blogs Baron in a 2005 post. "Most outside of the profession think that it's all about sex and money. Those same people usually think of anything sexual between unmarried people as being dirty. They have no idea how much caring, compassion and nurturing goes into providing intimacy. A good provider offers herself as a companion which is far more than just a sex toy. I have no respect or regard for those people who cheapen the profession by standing on street corners. They are the main reason that so many have such a low opinion of sex work. THEY are the ones that always get seen! A good professional is very discreet for everyone's protection."

I had a little confab with her on this a while back, at the state Democratic convention, no less. I was there reporting, and she was there doing a little observing for her camp. Her adult daughter was with her, as were a couple of other nativists. Below's a sampling of the give and take from the impromptu interview I did with her.

I should state that I actually like Brandy as a person. I've found both her and her daughter to be civil with me, unlike most other U.S.A. members, such as alleged public urinator Buffalo Rick Galeener, Craig Tillman and others. I think it's hypocritical of her to be for the enforcement of all laws, save for those having to do with the world's oldest profession. But one's own hypocrisy is always the easiest to justify, right, Brandy?

The call's gone out from ex-KIA peddler Rusty Childress' United for a Sovereign America, the most militant outfit of racist knuckledraggers in the Valley: Their old buddy state Rep. Russell Pearce, aka, Mr. Ethnic Cleansing needs their help. Or so goes the line on Childress' immigrationbuzz.com, under a blog post entitled, "Your presence is requested," wherein the nativist troglodytes announce the upcoming Legislative District 18 Clean Elections primary debate to include Pearce and his state Senate primary opponent, attorney Kevin Gibbons.

They warn that the debate is being put on by "the very far left Children’s Action Alliance," and so, "Mr. Pearce would love to have your [sic] show your support for the Conservative Candidates. Please plan to attend."

"Children's Action Alliance!? Sounds like a buncha dang Commies. Why, they're prolly all for anchor babies, too!"

Or so you can imagine such U.S.A.-affiliated cave dwellers as alleged public urinator Buffalo Rick Galeener, wing-nutty Hobbit lady Anna Gaines, and aged neo-Nazi Elton Hall saying to themselves. Be looking for U.S.A. members such as these to show up, perhaps even the prejudiced playboy Childress himself. (He has loads of time on his hands since he sold the lot.) Why, if the stars align, maybe Pearce's personal political albatross, his ofay Willie Horton -- I mean, Mesa neo-Nazi and Republican precinct committeeman J.T. Ready -- will be there in the flesh. And lots of it.

I just hope there's plenty of security present in case J.T. and Elton decide to reenact Kristallnacht while in the audience. These are the sorts of people whom Pearce attracts: Childress, who is a long-time Pearce supporter; Ready, whom I watched Pearce work a crowd with at a June 2007 anti-immigrant function; Gaines, the anti-Hispanic Hispanic, and a regular speaker at committee hearings held by Pearce in the state House.

Additionally, in April, it was reported that Pearce was soliciting donations on the site of bigoted border activist Glenn Spencer. Spencer heads up a hate group in Sierra Vista called American Border Patrol, and he once famously wrote the Los Angeles Times that,

"The Mexican culture is based on deceit. Chicanos and Mexicanos lie as a means of survival. Mexicans who have truly become Americans have shed themselves of this survival mechanism."

Ooh-kay. Back away slowly from the ammo and the bag of Elmer's glue and no one gets hurt, Glenn.

And of course, who could forget the 2006 incident where Pearce forwarded a neo-Nazi National Alliance e-mail to his supporters? These are not mistakes. They are part of a pattern. A pattern that in any other state of the union would get you relegated to political oblivion.

But what do local Republicans think is worse than courting white supremacists? Getting a donation from a Dem. In fact, some Republicans got their Levi's in a twist recently when they learned that none other than Jim Pederson -- you know, that cat with the Foster Brooks smile who ran against Jon Kyl last time around -- had given moolah to Kevin Gibbons' campaign.

Let's return to Honduras for a moment and check in with Sheriff's office pal "Roatan Bruce" Starr, a radio-personality in the Bay Islands, Honduras who also pens articles for the English-language pub Honduras This Week Online. You may recall that it was Starr's show Chief Deputy David Hendershott visited, along with other MCSO hotshots, back in 2007 to promote the MCSO's activity in Honduras, which included training Honduran police officers on the county dime, and paying for the trips from the MCSO's RICO budget.

Despite Sheriff Arpaio's promises to suspend the program, the Honduran Operation is believed to be ongoing, part of an effort by the MCSO and Hendershott to set up a Honduran base for a massive facial recognition project, on which the MCSO has spent hundreds of thousands of dollars. It's also been revealed by Channel 12's Joe Dana that Hendershott pitched just such a facial recognition project to a rep of the European Union. Dana has alleged a friendship between Hendershott and a CEO of the county vendor providing the facial recognition technology. And Dana's reported that Hendershott's traveled to China, staying in the same hotel as this vendor.

The guy whose kiss-ass reports inadvertently brought the Honduran scandal to light was Honduran radio personality "Roatan Bruce" Starr. Starr's radio shows and his column's for the English-language pub Honduras This Week Online, are pure boosterism. And he apparently took it personally when the Phoenix media began using his "Aw, shucks" articles and interviews with David Hendershott and other MCSO brass to expose the MCSO's efforts in Starr's adopted land.

Take this gripe from Starr describing his interview of National Police Officer on the Bay Islands, Commissario Julio Benitez, which Starr did March 17, 2008.

"We also talked about the problems a few one sided and self-serving reporters from the Phoenix area have caused for our Sisterhood Law Enforcement Project started by the Maricopa County Sherrif's [sic] Department," wrote Starr. "Please listen to this interview to see how damaging a few people can be to ruin it for the safety, security and protection for us in The Bay Islands and all of Honduras. Maybe we should all contact the publisher of the Arizona Republic newspapers to voice our opinions about the awful job of reporting a competing underground newspaper is doing to hurt us here."

The caustic sensation of hatred and bile inching up the back of my throat: It's the same feeling I used to get as a teenager in North Carolina, as I watched Republican Senator Jesse Helms play the race card over and over again, to effectively divide and conquer my home state, and win reelection, often by the narrowest of margins. Now, as I read the obits for the 86-year-old Senator, who croaked early this a.m., my disgust with this man and everything he represents comes back to me, like some long-distance mental boomerang that I thought I'd discarded eons ago.

Helms was an ardent white supremacist, practically a Klan member minus the robes. Race-baiting was a constant throughout Helms' career, a tactic he used to get himself and others elected, one that he leavened heavily with cheap, brazen McCarthyism. From the 1950 U.S. Senate primary contest between Democrats Willis Smith and Frank Porter Graham, where Jesse (a Dem himself at the time) helped smear Graham with the then deadly charge of being in favor of the "mingling of the races," to his bigoted anti-Civil Rights rants as a commentator for WRAL-TV, and on to his filibustering of a federal holiday to honor Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., Helms never wavered in his opposition to equal rights for African-Americans. He appealed to the worst of what was in most North Carolinians. His 30 years representing the Old North State in the Senate will forever be a stain on North Carolina's history.

Of course, Helms' evil extended beyond the expansive boundaries of racial politics. Helms hated gays, openly referred to homosexuals as "disgusting," famously telling the New York Times concerning AIDS that, "We've got to have some common sense about a disease transmitted by people deliberately engaging in unnatural acts." Later in his career, he supported assistance to Africa to help combat AIDS, but he remained resolute in his bigoted beliefs that homosexuality was immoral and that gays were responsible for spreading the disease in the United States.

I know absolutely nothing about this album cover, save that it's hilarious...

Abroad, Helms supported every murderous, right-wing dictator and politician he could find. He was a great admirer of Chile's General Augusto Pinochet, and one of the primary sponsors of El Salvador's Roberto D'Aubuisson, founder of the ARENA party and organizer of the country's rightist death squads. Helms was, of course, a tireless anti-Communist crusader. But he only saw human rights abuses in Communist dictatorships. Those in right-wing dictatorships were either overlooked or forgiven.

Local anti-immigrant activist and alleged public urinator Buffalo Rick Galeener inched a tad closer to trial today on a March 8 incident in which Galeener stands accused of taking an al fresco whiz nearby the Macehualli Work Center near Bell and 25th Street. Galeener's lawyer Joey Hamby asked for and received another continuance in the case, stating he'd not had time to interview everyone he needed to interview. He also informed the court that he was lawyering on a capital murder case beginning at the end of July which was expected to run four or five months.

Judge Deborah Griffith warned Hamby that, "I'm not going to continue this case till the end of the year." She cut him very little slack due to the capital murder case he has coming up, informing Hamby that she wanted to see him in court representing his client, and not some other attorney covering for him. Griffith then set the next court date for August 15 at 8:30 a.m., telling Hamby that gave him "six weeks to get started on interviews" of potential witnesses.

Though Assistant City Prosecutor Sam Lesly stated that he only planed to call about three witnesses, Hamby indicated that he foresaw calling as many as 10 to 15 witnesses, and that he believed there was video tape related to the incident.

Video tape? I hope not of Galeener making water, which sounds nearly as unappetizing as the Verne Troyer sex tape.

In the police report of the incident, Buffalo admitted to urinating, though he said he did so in his truck where no one could see him. So are the 10 to 15 people going to testify during a trial that they couldn't see Buffalo enjoy the pause that refreshes? What would be the point of that? Only one person says she saw Buffalo in flagrante delicto, the victim Paulita Cortes. Her two-year old son was present by her side, but he's too young to have any sense of what may or may not have happened.

The suggestion that upwards of 15 witnesses might be called on a Class 1 misdemeanor citation, suggests that a three ring circus might be in the offing. Hopefully, Judge Griffith can keep it from becoming so. Later, when asked if extraneous issues might intrude on the banal facts of the incident, Hamby noted that, "Both sides have a right to be passionate about this case." Uh, OK. But at the end of the day, it's all about whether Galeener whipped it out and peed in his plastic container in plain view of others, rather than just moseying down the block to the nearby McDonalds or Taco Bell, where he could've done his biz in private.

Ancient oldsters being wheeled around by their 70-year-old "children." Blue-hairs lugging about their own oxygen tanks. A withered old crone with literally one tooth in her mouth, eager to get her book signed. The occasional redneck. Some broad from former KIA-peddler Rusty Childress' bike outfit Riders U.S.A. buying a half dozen copies of Joe's new tome. This is what the line looked like at the Barnes and Noble in Surprise on Saturday. Like you needed proof that Joe's big in the Sun City area, Joe's core audience of alter kockers bought an estimated 80 or so books during the book signing.

Joe's fans are so old, when they went to school, they didn't have history...

I say "estimated" because the bookstore employees acted like they were scared witless of press, and clammed up over even the most picayune of factoids. Remember back when people who worked in bookstores were not pathetic corporate drones? That's a subject for a different day, of course, but real bookstores used to employ a more independent breed. Nowadays, they seem mostly cowed and obedient. They might as well be selling plumbing supplies instead of books.

A lone Riders USA Member loading up on books. Who knew they could read?

Joe himself looked tired, washed-out, beat. Although a few sign-wielding protesters were out in the 100-degree heat, representin' por la causa, there was no one on the inside intent on interrupting the geriatric love-fest with an embarrassing question, as in the past. Nor were there any TV news cameras around. I got there a little late, with Joe wrapping up his remarks to the living cemetery before him.

"Real criminals," like Joe and his flunkies.

"Here's that guy from the New Times," announced Joe when he saw me. "He follows me around. Yeah, the one in the green shirt...That was a very vicious article you wrote about my book signing, slander and everything else. Keep it up."

"It's the real truth, Joe," I shot back. Joe was referring to my review of his book Joe's Law in New Times' most recent issue.

The grannies in attendance booed and yelled, "Remove him!" Some dough-faced alter kocker dood told me to, "Get out of here." I told him, politely, that it's still a free country, despite what he wants it to be. Do all old people end up this way, or is it just that authority-worshipping a-holes retire to Sand Land? There certainly are a butt-load of them around. And, sadly, they vote, though many barely know what day it is or where they are.

You'll get no argument here...

So where was Joe yesterday afternoon for the big Mesa sweep? Pro-immigrant protesters were out in full force in front of the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office substation in Mesa. Joe's political rival Dan Saban made an appearance. Every TV and radio station in town was there, as were photographers and print journos from the AP, the Arizona Republic, La Voz, and so on. Nativist protesters from the American Freedom Riders showed up, though the far more extremist wing-nut org United for a Sovereign America and its crew of hate-addled, snaggletoothed rednecks wimped out, like the pathetic poltroons that they are.

All the players in the Valley's pro-immigrant movement were in attendance: Sal Reza, Danny Ortega, Lydia Guzman, Alfredo Gutierrez, etc. There was also a tent and a stage provided courtesy of Radio Campesina. Before the MCSO substation itself, scores of Mesa cops kept watch in the middle of Javelina Avenue, keeping the nearly 200 anti-Joe folks on one side and the 15 or 20 pro-Joe people on the other. Mesa Police Chief George Gascon personally reviewed the troops at one point, and came out later to talk to the press.

"As you can tell, the operation is a successful one, so far," Gascon told members of the Fourth Estate. "We have people that are here expressing their views, whether for or against. They're doing it peacefully. We believe this is a marked difference from what occurred in past operations in Guadalupe and Phoenix. So far--and I don't want to claim victory yet--but so far what we have attempted to do here is occurring."

But where, oh where, was the Coward of the County, our crotchety top constable, mean ol' Nickel Bag Joe? Lashing out like a wounded animal up on the 19th floor of the Wells Fargo Building in downtown Phoenix, whining that George Gascon leaked his plan of attack on Mesa to the press, and bitching that he had no choice but to set up his mobile command center outside of Mesa, as his brownshirts hunt Hispanics in the streets.

Of course, it's Joe who refused to share info with Gascon, not the other way 'round. And, let's be honest, if Joe were really the badass he pretends to be, then he'd be going after real criminals -- like those villains behind the 40K criminal warrants outstanding in county--instead of chasing brown people with broken tail lights.

By now, nearly everyone's seen the freakin' hi-larious clip above of Suns center Shaquille O'Neal dissin' the Lakers' Kobe Bryant for not being able to take an NBA championship without him, bustin' rhymes like, "You know how I be/Last week Kobe couldn't do without me," and asking the NBA MVP, "Kobe, for real, tell me how my ass tastes."

Shaq's freestyle rap at a New York nightclub has been all the buzz since TMZ.com posted the video. Now Maricopa County's tired ol' Sheriff Joe's trying to horn in on the publicity, declaring that he's removing Shaq from his posse, all because of The Big Cactus' salty language and his use of the n-word.

"I want his two badges back," Arpaio spat to the Associated Press, referring to Shaq's ceremonial positions as a special deputy and a colonel of the MCSO posse. "Because if any one of my deputies did something like this, they're fired. I don't condone this type of racial conduct."

What a pant-load! Arpaio's calling Shaq a racist? The sheriff who's devoted the last year and a half of his tenure in office to racially profiling brown people? The sheriff whose jails are practically run by race-based gangs like the Aryan Brotherhood? The sheriff who proclaims that every undocumented Mexican is a "criminal" even though at most such individuals are only guilty of a civil violation? The sheriff who does sweeps of freakin' water-parks and reportedly plans to go hunting for Hispanics in Mesa this week?

(For more dope on the upcoming anti-brown sweep of Mesa, check the press release at the end of this article from the Mesa Police Association condemning Arpaio.)

The way Sheriff Joe wishes it would be...

All this because Shaq, a black man, used the n-word, which is part of the parlance of hip-hop. By Joe's senile old logic, that would make not only every rapper alive a racist, but brand much of the African-American community racist as well. Earth to Joe: If you use the n-word and you're African-American, that's acceptable under current cultural rules, like it or not. That'd be like you calling yourself a wrinkled old cracka, Joe. Or referring to your Chief Deputy David Hendershott as a two-ton, pasta-poundin' ofay peckerwood.

But in reality, Joe's cheap-ass publicity stunt has nothing to do with outrage over the use of the n-word, or any other, um, off-color verbiage. Nah, this is all payback for Shaq turning a cold-shoulder on the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office and choosing to become a reserve officer with a real police force, the Tempe PD, instead.