Machete's Steven Seagal Is Joe Arpaio's Deputy Dawg

picresized_1283537091_seagal.jpg
Here's a tough one: Which is the fake lawman?

Recently, someone e-mailed me asking if the aged, stone-faced action hero Steven Seagal, who stars in Robert Rodriguez's Mexican-immigration revenge flick Machete as a badass drug lord, was one of Sheriff Joe Arpaio's "special deputies." You know, like Lou Ferrigno, Ted Nugent, and other lesser lights.

I told the e-mailer I kind of vaguely recalled Seagal coming through town and stopping off at the Joe show, but couldn't remember precisely. I forgot about it till today, when I spotted Joe's tweet, "Ironically one of my very own special deputies is starring in tomorrow's controversial film `Machete'." 

Joe posted the above photo of the pair on the aptly-named "twitpic."

Gotta wonder if Arpaio offered Seagal some acting lessons, being that Seagal comes from the wooden Indian school of theater, and Arpaio is pretty good at acting like he's not worried about the federal grand jury looking into him for criminal abuse-of-power charges.

The trailer's so good, it's worth watching for the umpteenth time

You'll recall, of course, Rodriguez's special Cinco de Mayo trailer of the film, which is dedicated to Arizona by the film's protagonist, played by Danny Trejo. If the film is half as good as this trailer, it should be worth the price of admission. I plan on checking it out tonight.

Some have suggested that a murderous cop vigilante character played in the film by Don Johnson is in part inspired by our own goofy gendarme. 

In an MCSO press release, Arpaio took exception, saying, "I am quite sure that `Machete' producers did not have me in mind when they developed this character."

Of course not, Joe, which is why that whipper-snapper Johnson scored the role. After all, Bea Arthur's dead and Eli Wallach was unavailable. The 60 year-old Johnson's way too young to be playing a geezer such as yourself.

Seems Seagal is actually a fully-commissioned deputy in Jefferson Parish, Louisiana. This was the basis for his A&E series Steven Seagal: Lawman, wherein he actually ran around after real criminals. That gives him one up on Joe, who prefers illegal dishwashers and landscapers to rapists, murderers, and bank robbers.

Hey, they don't call Joe "nickel bag," for nothin'.


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18 comments
peter j. melian
peter j. melian

Comrades !  Comrades !  As usual public opinion off-track.  It's not the immigrantas that bothers Arpaio.  It's his ugly snout.  If he could fix it he'd be a happy person and so would his poor victims.pjm

Full Metal Pizza
Full Metal Pizza

Yep and while at it throw in some other badasses such as John McClane, the Expendables, the Inglorious Basterds, GI Joe and Brigadier Gen. Jack D. Ripper in case the russian mob gets involved and make Nico suddenly busy crapping his drawers.

And I heard the Simpsons are getting deputized as well. Except Lisa.

Rule of Law
Rule of Law

Another lame fantasy film. These mexicants couldn't fight themselves out of a pinata.

Me
Me

Lou Ferigno and now Steven Seagal.

You know your career is toast when you are reduced to playing second banana to Joe Arpayaso just to tack ten more seconds on your misspent 15 minutes of fame.

wherewasi
wherewasi

Did anyone catch Arpaio on KPHO morning news, I think it was Monday morning, where he said something about Machete and Don Johnson portraying a "Joe like" character. He went on to say that he knows he is "high profile, but that just comes along with the job".

Quick - can anyone name ONE (Just ONE) other county sheriff in the United States of America that believes it is his job to be high profile?

Shurf Joke has apparently confused fighting crime with being on television; understandably an easy mistake to make, but still...

DG
DG

Sheriff Shitstain should keep two things in mind:

1. He'll never be as handsome and good looking as Don Johnson.

2. Machete is just a work of fiction...just like his career in law enforcement!

boomer49
boomer49

mini-gun on a motorcycleROFLMFAO!!!!!looks like a great live action cartoon...maybe ROAD RUNNERS REVENGE!

One good thing...it's gonna make the REICH WINGNUTS GNASH THEIR TEETH (you figure one tooth per teabagger so in a gathering of beige sand rats that would be teeth) AND WAIL!!!

GENO
GENO

Hey Feathered Bastard, make it more crystal clear by saying:"That gives one up on Joe, who prefers dishwashers and landscapers [as opposed] to rapists, murderers and bank robbers."

This way, imbecilic nativist readers and johnny-come-latelys will know the difference. We know how easily confused they get. And btw, looking forward to seeing the movie. We chose MACHETE over Clooney's "The American".

Coz
Coz

Piss on Seagal and Bozo Joe.

deportjoe
deportjoe

It should be noted that Seagal is actually facing civil court action right now questioning whether he has taken part in a human trafficking scheme.

http://humantrafficking.change...

Leave it to Sheriff Joe to disregard actual crime on the part of his buddies, while terrorizing communities here in Arizona.

Guest
Guest

I will be out of the office on vacation, returning Monday, November 29th.

If this is an emergency, please contact Bill Volhein, Lee Reynolds or Tanner Postert.

Thanks,-B

Coz
Coz

Yes, Bozo Joe Arpaio is a real legend...in his own senile mind.

Alehound
Alehound

allegations now dismissed. old news man.

Guest
Guest

I will be out of the office on vacation, returning Monday, November 29th.

If this is an emergency, please contact Bill Volhein, Lee Reynolds or Tanner Postert.

Thanks,-B

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