Email AuthorMatthew Hendley
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Arizona Cardinals End Nine-Game Suck-Fest, Defeat the Detroit Lions 38-10
December 17, 2012 in Valley Fever
Here's your Christmas miracle, folks: the Arizona Cardinals won an actual football game, and they actually scored touchdowns in the process.After losing nine games in a row, rookie quarterback Ryan...
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After Sandy Hook Shooting, Is It Time for More Gun Laws?
December 17, 2012 in Valley Fever
Just about everyone in the country knows that 26 people -- incuding 20 children -- were shot and killed at the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown Connecticut last week,...
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Since Jared Loughner's Tucson Massacre, Six U.S. Shootings Have Been Deadlier, Including Today's Shooting in Connecticut
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
Jared Loughner murdered six people in January, 2011.Consider this: it hasn't quite been two years since Jared Loughner opened fire outside a Tucson safeway, killing six people, and injuring 13,...
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Phoenix Mayor Greg Stanton, Police Chief Daniel Garcia Cautiously Assure Local Safety in Response to Newtown Shooting
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
Photo by Matthew HendleyPhoenix Police Chief Daniel Garcia (at podium), along with (left to right) city Councilman Michael Nowakowski, Mayor Greg Stanton, City Manager David Cavazos, and Assistant Police Chief...
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Maricopa County Mugshots of the Week: Shakin' My Head
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
MCSOJust about every week, we bring you a roundup of visitors to the desert's own Fourth Avenue Jail. To be considered for our Maricopa County mugshots of the week, get...
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Joseluis Marquez Sentenced to Life in Prison for 2010 Murder of ASU Student Kyleigh Sousa
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
Tempe PDJoseluis MarquezJoseluis Marquez was sentenced to life in prison, plus a few extra years, for the 2010 robbery and murder of 21-year-old Arizona State University student Kyleigh Sousa.Sousa was...
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James Naylor Lands on Probation for Trying to Meet Up With "Hung K9" From Craigslist
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
MCSOJames NaylorJames Naylor -- one of the men busted in recent months in Sheriff Joe Arpaio's Craigslist bestiality stings -- was sentenced this morning to 18 months on probation.An MCSO...
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Will Anything Crazy Happen (Like a Portal Opening in Sedona) on December 21?
December 14, 2012 in Valley Fever
Since we're now a week away from December 21, now would be a good time to sort out everyone's plans.As you've probably heard, there are people who believe that some...
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John McCain Somehow Got His Way -- Susan Rice Doesn't Want to Be Secretary of State
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
Senator John McCainDespite becoming the butt of jokes for his concerns about the attack on the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, Libya, Senator John McCain got his way -- U.N. Ambassador...
Arizona Cardinals Back to Ryan Lindley at Quarterback Because Who Gives a Damn
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
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Joe Arpaio's Lawyers Fail to Get Sheriff Off the Hook in Justice Department Lawsuit
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
Photo by Matthew HendleySheriff Joe ArpaioLawyers for Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio have failed in their attempt to get the Justice Department's racial-discrimination lawsuit tossed.Chief U.S. District Judge Roslyn Silver...
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Jack Culolias Disappearance: Apparent "Last Photo" of ASU Freshman Pops Up
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
FacebookJack Culolias (black shirt).The last known picture taken of missing ASU freshman Jack Culolias was given to his twin brother, who posted it on Facebook yesterday.See also:-Search for ASU Freshman...
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Joe Arpaio Issues Press Release to Point Out People From Other Countries Work at MCSO
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
Not everyone a white American, Sheriff claims.After a review of MCSO's hiring practices, Sheriff Joe Arpaio has issued a press release to assure the public that not everyone working for...
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Joe Arpaio's Identity Change to "Oldest" Sheriff in America: Yay or Nay?
December 13, 2012 in Valley Fever
Joe Arpaio's TwitterAn elderly man holding a puppy.Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio doesn't want to be called the (obviously self-proclaimed) "toughest" sheriff in America anymore, he wants to be called...
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Phoenix Babysitters Arrested After Child With "Too Many [Bruises] to Count" Dies
People That Shouldn't Be Near Children
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
MCSOAllison Clement (left) and Ryan Reed.A married couple that runs an unlicensed babysitting business out of their home has been arrested, after a 3-year-old girl with many, many injuries died...
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Joe Arpaio Wants to Be Called America's "Oldest" Sheriff, Instead of "Toughest"
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio now wants to be called America's "oldest" sheriff, instead of the title (he gave himself) of America's "toughest" sheriff.As you can see above, in the...
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Arizona Secession Movement Can't Even Gather Enough Support on Meaningless Online Petition
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
chronicleoftheoldwest.comThe national flag of the "Republikkk of Dumbfuckistan."Don't worry, folks -- President Obama will not have to take into consideration the thousands of people who wanted Arizona to secede from...
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Kevin Kolb's Toast for the Season, Clearing the Way for Cardinals' Total Suck-Fest
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
azcardinals.comGlass sculpture Kevin Kolb.The Arizona Cardinals have placed porcelain doll quarterback Kevin Kolb on injured reserve, meaning he's done for the season.That move leaves the Cardinals with three options at...
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Drug Smugglers Now Shooting Cannons Into United States, Using Cans of Weed as Ammo
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
Border PatrolThe ammo from a weed cannon.The people who smuggle drugs into the United States from Mexico really have some ingenious ways of getting the goods over the border.There's the...
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Is Paul Gosar's Demand for Answers on Bombing Suspect Totally Bogus?
December 12, 2012 in Valley Fever
Congressman Paul GosarRepublican Congressman Paul Gosar claims he wants answers to his questions about alleged federal-building bomber Abdullatif Aldosary.A letter from Gosar's chief of staff to immigration officials says Gosar...
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Abdullatif Aldosary Pleads Not Guilty to Charges in Casa Grande Bombing Case
December 11, 2012 in Valley Fever
ADOCAbdullatif Aldosary's prison mug.Abdullatif Aldosary -- the Coolidge resident accused of detonating an "explosive device" outside the Social Security Administration building in Casa Grande a couple weeks ago -- pleaded...
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Sedona Man Plans on Jumping Off a Tall Rock on December 21, Believes He'll Land in a Portal
December 11, 2012 in Valley Fever
A Sedona man plans on jumping off a very tall rock on December 21, and he believes he will be landing in a cosmic portal. Peter Gersten, a retired lawyer...
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Laurie Kelly Gets Jail, Probation for Trading Homeless People Beer for Babysitting Services So She Could Go Have Sex
December 11, 2012 in Valley Fever
MCSOLaurie KellyWhat Mesa resident Laurie Kelly told police was "a manic sexual rage inside of her which she cannot control" has landed her a stint in jail, and a few...
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Debbie Schlussel: Why Did Paul Gosar Do Nothing About "Known Terrorist" in District?
December 11, 2012 in Valley Fever
Congressman Paul Gosar's constituent Abdullatif Ali Aldosary.Conservative political commentator Debbie Schlussel can sometimes wildly miss the mark on her points -- occasionally dabbling in conspiracy-theory-level stuff -- but she's got...
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Kenneth Cyrus Accused of Uploading Child Porn to Facebook
December 11, 2012 in Valley Fever
MCSOKenneth Cyrus -- find him on Facebook.Kenneth Cyrus may not be the sharpest child-pornography-collecting tool in the shed.According to police, the married, 36-year-old Phoenix resident uploaded child pornography to Facebook...
